When our eldest daughter was 13 and before she started her period, my then husband told me he did not want her to use tampons because it would break her hymen and it was important for her future husband to do so.
Category: Legalism
Spiritual Abuse: Black/White Thinking Can be Used to Harm and Control
In black/white churches, you have two choices: follow along with the pastor, or you are immediately castigated as someone who has made the wrong choice. If people know of your "bad" choice, you may be called a sinner or rebellious.
Christ Saved the World through Redemption, Not Condemnation
What's interesting is if you address these people and question the way they are attack you and your beliefs, they quip they are telling you this in love and they are being Biblical. It never feels like love. It's rude. It seems like a clanging cymbal to me. Love is patient and kind, right?
Negative Google Reviews are Still Keeping People Away from My Spiritually Abusive Church 6 Years after Lawsuit
Chuck O'Neal, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, Spiritual Abuse, Negative Google Reviews, Defamation Lawsuit The other day, I got a call from my good friend, Michelle, who used to attend the cult/church we attended. Her husband used to be on staff at the church (Beaverton Grace Bible Church) and was fired. That led to… Continue reading Negative Google Reviews are Still Keeping People Away from My Spiritually Abusive Church 6 Years after Lawsuit
Classical Conversations #7: Business or a Non-Profit; Cult or a Christian Homeschool Group?
*** NOTE: This is part of a series that began with these earlier posts: Classical Conversations #1: The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly Classical Conversations #2: What Led You to Join a Classical Conversations Homeschool Community? #ClassicalConvMadeKnown Classical Conversations #3: Leaders Delete Comments and Block Commenters Who Don’t Toe the Line Classical Conversations #4: A CC… Continue reading Classical Conversations #7: Business or a Non-Profit; Cult or a Christian Homeschool Group?
Tedd Tripp and Tom Chantry: Shepherding a Child’s Heart … or Not
Tedd Tripp, Tom Chantry, Failure to Report, Mandatory Reporter, Spanking, Shepherding a Child's Heart *** *** In the late 1990s, I attended a parenting seminar by Tedd Tripp. It may or may not be significant to note that the seminar was held at a Sovereign Grace Ministries church in Chesapeake, Virginia. Shepherding a Child's Heart… Continue reading Tedd Tripp and Tom Chantry: Shepherding a Child’s Heart … or Not
Classical Conversations #1: The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly
Classical Conversations, Homeschool, Classical Education, #ClassicalConvMadeKnown *** About 10 years ago, I was at a homeschool family camp with my family in Washington state, and it was talent-show night. Previous years at the talent show, children and families sang, kids performed skits, or danced a routine. However, this year, there were a couple of… Continue reading Classical Conversations #1: The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly
BREAKING NEWS: Dr. Paige Patterson Terminated, Effective Immediately: No Title, No Housing, No Ongoing Compensation
Paige Patterson, Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary, SBC, #Churchtoo, #ChurchToo, #MeToo *** A new statement was just released at Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary: During the May 30, 2018, Executive Committee meeting of the Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary (SWBTS) Board of Trustees, new information confirmed this morning was presented regarding the handling of an allegation of… Continue reading BREAKING NEWS: Dr. Paige Patterson Terminated, Effective Immediately: No Title, No Housing, No Ongoing Compensation
Personal Story: What Did the Church Teach You about Yourself?
Spiritual abuse, sex abuse, patriarchy, domestic violence, Sovereign Grace, Desiring God, CJ Mahaney, John Piper, Mental Health *** *** Part of recovery from abusive churches is coming to grips with what you were taught and how it affected you. Sometimes, and very appropriately, the ability to see this clearly results in anger. Jennifer Michelle posted… Continue reading Personal Story: What Did the Church Teach You about Yourself?
The David and Louise Turpin Family Homeschool Cult
David and Louise Turpin, Homeschool, Cult, Abuse, Torture *** Most likely you have heard the news about the large homeschooling family, the Turpins, from California. The parents, David, 57, and Louise, 49, Turpin who were arrested for torture and child endangerment, with bail set at $9 million each. Here are some of the key facts:… Continue reading The David and Louise Turpin Family Homeschool Cult
Book Review Series – Lori Alexander’s “The Power of a Transformed Wife” – Repeat Five Times: Yoga Pants Are Not Modest!
The Power of a Transformed Wife, Lori Alexander, Modesty -by Kathi This is a book review series of The Power of a Transformed Wife by Lori Alexander. If you are just joining us, you may click on previous chapter reviews if you'd like to catch up. Introduction & Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter… Continue reading Book Review Series – Lori Alexander’s “The Power of a Transformed Wife” – Repeat Five Times: Yoga Pants Are Not Modest!
Heath Lambert, Albert Mohler, and SBTS Draw Line in Sand on Christian Counseling and Dr. Eric Johnson
Biblical Counseling, Christian Counseling, Nouthetic Counseling, Heath Lambert, Albert Mohler, Dr. Eric Johnson, SBTS There has been an ugly conflict in social media these last few days regarding the apparent firing of Dr. Eric Johnson from Southern Baptist Theological Seminary (SBTS). This petition - Petition Against the Wrongful Firing of Dr. Eric Johnson - has been circulating… Continue reading Heath Lambert, Albert Mohler, and SBTS Draw Line in Sand on Christian Counseling and Dr. Eric Johnson
Pastor Chuck O’Neal Continues to Pull the Wool over His Evangelist Friends’ Eyes
Chuck O'Neal, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, Jeff Rose, Dr. Edward Delcour, Mike Gendron, Mike Stockwell, and Robert Gray, Evangelism Reformation Conference, Reformation Fire Conference https://twitter.com/ChuckONeal_/status/883432785221894144 *** I don't have a problem with those tweets. On the surface, they are fine. But even false teachers get things right. The Bible tells us: For certain individuals whose… Continue reading Pastor Chuck O’Neal Continues to Pull the Wool over His Evangelist Friends’ Eyes
Blog Series: Spiritual Abuse in the Church: A Guide to Recognition and Recovery by Pastor Ken Garrett, Wk 2
Spiritual Abuse, Pastor Ken Garrett, Spiritual Abuse in the church: A Guide to Recognition and Recovery *** Ok, here we go, plowing through Pastor Ken Garret's dissertation about spiritual abuse. I used the word plowing intentionally. For some of us, it will be work. It is not enjoyable to be reminded about difficult experiences. However,… Continue reading Blog Series: Spiritual Abuse in the Church: A Guide to Recognition and Recovery by Pastor Ken Garrett, Wk 2
How our Pastor’s Biblical Interpretation Can Affect Our Understanding of Scripture and God
*** This is a very insightful statement from C.J. Mahaney. https://twitter.com/CJMahaney/status/739414015546404864 When a pastor preaches, he is leading his congregation in his interpretation of Scripture. It may or may not be correct. I know from reading many personal stories of those who were Mahaney's church that his teachings caused spiritual harm. I don't think… Continue reading How our Pastor’s Biblical Interpretation Can Affect Our Understanding of Scripture and God
Help! My Family Member or Close Friend is Trapped in a High-Controlling Church or Cult. How Can I Encourage Them to Leave?
How to help a family member or friend leave a high-controlling church group or cult: spiritual abuse, trapped, thought reform, mind control, freedom “Mind control is the process by which individual or collective freedom of choice and action is compromised by agents or agencies that modify or distort perception, motivation, affect, cognition and/or behavioral… Continue reading Help! My Family Member or Close Friend is Trapped in a High-Controlling Church or Cult. How Can I Encourage Them to Leave?
Domestic Violence is NOT a Marriage Issue, but an Abuse Issue
Domestic Violence, Naghmeh and Saeed Abedini, Divorce, Marriage, Abuse, Church Response to Abuse Earlier today, I participated in a discussion at SharperIron.org. The discussion is about Saeed and Naghmeh Abedini and domestic violence. A commenter, dmyers, is having trouble with Naghmeh's earlier statements, challenging her claims of abuse, etc. I have an assignment due in… Continue reading Domestic Violence is NOT a Marriage Issue, but an Abuse Issue
The Fallout of Spiritual Abuse on Our Children
Children Harmed by Spiritual Abuse Yesterday, I was talking with my programming language tutor and mentioned that I had a blog. He asked what my blog was about and I told him the long story. He was absolutely dumbfounded by what he was hearing and kept shaking his head, not wanting to believe it, even… Continue reading The Fallout of Spiritual Abuse on Our Children
Spiritual Abuse: What Was the Last Straw That Caused You to Leave Your Abusive Church?
Spiritual Abuse - What finally made you realize you had to leave your church? *** *** I had already told my husband that I had to leave BGBC, with or without him, but I was hoping that he would come to the same conclusion without my influence. That finally happened after our close friend who was… Continue reading Spiritual Abuse: What Was the Last Straw That Caused You to Leave Your Abusive Church?
How has the Josh Duggar Scandal affected you? Are you experiencing painful reminders?
Josh Duggar, sex scandal, painful reminders, homeschool movement, patriarchy, purity and modesty culture, Bill Gothard *** *** With the recent disclosure of sexual infidelity by Josh Duggar, I have been noticing a lot of people who have been influenced by Patriarchy, Quiverfull, Bill Gothard, Homeschool Movement, etc, trying to make sense of what is going… Continue reading How has the Josh Duggar Scandal affected you? Are you experiencing painful reminders?