ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Disturbing Trends, Extra-Biblical Nonsense, God's Design for the Family, It's All About the Image, Julie Anne's Personal Stories, Legalism, Marriage, Modesty and Purity Teachings, Parenting, Patriarchal-Complementarian Movement, Personal Stories, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies, SURVIVOR STORIES, Women and the Church

What was it like in my Patriarchal home, you ask? Let’s discuss hymens.

When our eldest daughter was 13 and before she started her period, my then husband told me he did not want her to use tampons because it would break her hymen and it was important for her future husband to do so.

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Doctrine as Idol, Julie Anne's Personal Stories, Legalism, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies

Spiritual Abuse: Black/White Thinking Can be Used to Harm and Control

In black/white churches, you have two choices: follow along with the pastor, or you are immediately castigated as someone who has made the wrong choice. If people know of your "bad" choice, you may be called a sinner or rebellious.

Authoritative Preaching, Doctrine as Idol, Julie Anne's Personal Stories, Legalism, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies

Christ Saved the World through Redemption, Not Condemnation

What's interesting is if you address these people and question the way they are attack you and your beliefs, they quip they are telling you this in love and they are being Biblical. It never feels like love. It's rude. It seems like a clanging cymbal to me. Love is patient and kind, right?

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, BGBC Google Reviews, BGBC Lawsuit, Chuck O'Neal, JULIE ANNE'S CASE, Leaving the Church, Legalism, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Bullies

Negative Google Reviews are Still Keeping People Away from My Spiritually Abusive Church 6 Years after Lawsuit

Chuck O'Neal, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, Spiritual Abuse, Negative Google Reviews, Defamation Lawsuit     The other day, I got a call from my good friend, Michelle, who used to attend the cult/church we attended. Her husband used to be on staff at the church (Beaverton Grace Bible Church) and was fired. That led to… Continue reading Negative Google Reviews are Still Keeping People Away from My Spiritually Abusive Church 6 Years after Lawsuit

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Abuse Systems and Transformation Tools, Classical Conversations, Dictators, It's All About the Image, Legalism, Misuse of Scripture, No-Talk Rule, Parenting, Personal Stories, Spiritual Bullies

Classical Conversations #7: Business or a Non-Profit; Cult or a Christian Homeschool Group?

*** NOTE: This is part of a series that began with these earlier posts: Classical Conversations #1: The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly Classical Conversations #2: What Led You to Join a Classical Conversations Homeschool Community? #ClassicalConvMadeKnown Classical Conversations #3: Leaders Delete Comments and Block Commenters Who Don’t Toe the Line Classical Conversations #4: A CC… Continue reading Classical Conversations #7: Business or a Non-Profit; Cult or a Christian Homeschool Group?

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Abuse Systems and Transformation Tools, Calvinism, Clergy Misconduct, Clergy Sex Abuse, Complementarianism, Debi Pearl, Doctrine as Idol, Failure to Report Crimes, It's All About the Image, John MacArthur, Legalism, Mandatory Reporting, Mark Driscoll, Michael Pearl, Parenting, Phil Johnson, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Sovereign Grace Ministries, Sovereign Grace Ministries Lawsuit, Tom Chantry

Tedd Tripp and Tom Chantry: Shepherding a Child’s Heart … or Not

Tedd Tripp, Tom Chantry, Failure to Report, Mandatory Reporter, Spanking, Shepherding a Child's Heart *** *** In the late 1990s, I attended a parenting seminar by Tedd Tripp. It may or may not be significant to note that the seminar was held at a Sovereign Grace Ministries church in Chesapeake, Virginia. Shepherding a Child's Heart… Continue reading Tedd Tripp and Tom Chantry: Shepherding a Child’s Heart … or Not

Classical Conversations, Doug Phillips & Vision Forum, Failure to Report Crimes, Homeschool Movement, It's All About the Image, Legalism, Mandatory Reporting, No-Talk Rule, Patriarchal-Complementarian Movement, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies, Stay-At-Home Daughters Movement, Vision Forum

Classical Conversations #1: The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly

Classical Conversations, Homeschool, Classical Education, #ClassicalConvMadeKnown ***   About 10 years ago, I was at a homeschool family camp with my family in Washington state, and it was talent-show night. Previous years at the talent show, children and families sang, kids performed skits, or danced a routine. However, this year, there were a couple of… Continue reading Classical Conversations #1: The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Abuse Systems and Transformation Tools, Clergy Misconduct, Domestic Violence and Churches, Extra-Biblical Nonsense, Failure to Report Crimes, Legalism, Mandatory Reporting, Misuse of Scripture, Narcissistic Pastors, Paige Patterson, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Southern Baptist Convention, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies, Women and the Church

BREAKING NEWS: Dr. Paige Patterson Terminated, Effective Immediately: No Title, No Housing, No Ongoing Compensation

Paige Patterson, Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary, SBC, #Churchtoo, #ChurchToo, #MeToo   *** A new statement was just released at Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary: During the May 30, 2018, Executive Committee meeting of the Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary (SWBTS) Board of Trustees, new information confirmed this morning was presented regarding the handling of an allegation of… Continue reading BREAKING NEWS: Dr. Paige Patterson Terminated, Effective Immediately: No Title, No Housing, No Ongoing Compensation

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, C.J. Mahaney, Calvinism, Christian Marriage, Clergy Sex Abuse, Domestic Violence, Extra-Biblical Nonsense, Failure to Report Crimes, James Dobson, John MacArthur, Legalism, Mandatory Reporting, Mental Health and the Church, Personal Stories, Recovery Process, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Sovereign Grace Ministries, Spiritual Abuse, SURVIVOR STORIES, The Gospel Coalition, Women and the Church

Personal Story: What Did the Church Teach You about Yourself?

Spiritual abuse, sex abuse, patriarchy, domestic violence, Sovereign Grace, Desiring God, CJ Mahaney, John Piper, Mental Health *** *** Part of recovery from abusive churches is coming to grips with what you were taught and how it affected you. Sometimes, and very appropriately, the ability to see this clearly results in anger. Jennifer Michelle posted… Continue reading Personal Story: What Did the Church Teach You about Yourself?

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, ABUSE RECOVERY PROCESS-PROBLEMS, Domestic Violence, Full-Quiver, Homeschool Legal Defense Association, Homeschool Movement, Legalism, Parenting, Patriarchal-Complementarian Movement, Recovery Process

The David and Louise Turpin Family Homeschool Cult

David and Louise Turpin, Homeschool, Cult, Abuse, Torture *** Most likely you have heard the news about the large homeschooling family, the Turpins, from California. The parents, David, 57, and Louise, 49, Turpin who were arrested for torture and child endangerment, with bail set at $9 million each. Here are some of the key facts:… Continue reading The David and Louise Turpin Family Homeschool Cult

Book Review Series, Doctrine as Idol, Gender Roles, Legalism, Lori Alexander, Modesty and Purity Teachings, The Transformed Wife, Women and the Church

Book Review Series – Lori Alexander’s “The Power of a Transformed Wife” – Repeat Five Times: Yoga Pants Are Not Modest!

The Power of a Transformed Wife, Lori Alexander, Modesty -by Kathi This is a book review series of The Power of a Transformed Wife by Lori Alexander. If you are just joining us, you may click on previous chapter reviews if you'd like to catch up. Introduction & Chapter 1   Chapter 2   Chapter 3   Chapter… Continue reading Book Review Series – Lori Alexander’s “The Power of a Transformed Wife” – Repeat Five Times: Yoga Pants Are Not Modest!

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Biblical Counseling, Disturbing Trends, Dr. Albert Mohler, Legalism, Mental Health and the Church, Southern Baptist Convention

Heath Lambert, Albert Mohler, and SBTS Draw Line in Sand on Christian Counseling and Dr. Eric Johnson

Biblical Counseling, Christian Counseling, Nouthetic Counseling, Heath Lambert, Albert Mohler, Dr. Eric Johnson, SBTS There has been an ugly conflict in social media these last few days regarding the apparent firing of Dr. Eric Johnson from Southern Baptist Theological Seminary (SBTS). This petition - Petition Against the Wrongful Firing of Dr. Eric Johnson  - has been circulating… Continue reading Heath Lambert, Albert Mohler, and SBTS Draw Line in Sand on Christian Counseling and Dr. Eric Johnson

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, BGBC Google Reviews, BGBC Lawsuit, BGBCSurvivors Imposter Blog, Chuck O'Neal, Church Discipline Process, Evangelism, Extra-Biblical Nonsense, It's All About the Image, Legalism, Meetings with the Pastor, Misuse of Scripture, Narcissistic Pastors, No-Talk Rule, Shunning, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies

Pastor Chuck O’Neal Continues to Pull the Wool over His Evangelist Friends’ Eyes

Chuck O'Neal, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, Jeff Rose, Dr. Edward Delcour, Mike Gendron, Mike Stockwell, and Robert Gray, Evangelism Reformation Conference, Reformation Fire Conference https://twitter.com/ChuckONeal_/status/883432785221894144 *** I don't have a problem with those tweets. On the surface, they are fine. But even false teachers get things right. The Bible tells us: For certain individuals whose… Continue reading Pastor Chuck O’Neal Continues to Pull the Wool over His Evangelist Friends’ Eyes

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Abuse Systems and Transformation Tools, Authoritative Preaching, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, Blog Series - Spiritual Abuse in the Church: A Guide to Recognition and Recovery, Chuck O'Neal, Church Bandwagon, CHURCH GOVERNANCE & POLICIES, Church Governance or Policy Issues, Crazy Things Church Leaders Say & Do, Doctrine as Idol, Extra-Biblical Nonsense, Julie Anne's Personal Stories, Leaving the Church, Legalism, Shunning, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies

Blog Series: Spiritual Abuse in the Church: A Guide to Recognition and Recovery by Pastor Ken Garrett, Wk 2

Spiritual Abuse, Pastor Ken Garrett, Spiritual Abuse in the church: A Guide to Recognition and Recovery *** Ok, here we go, plowing through Pastor Ken Garret's dissertation about spiritual abuse. I used the word plowing intentionally. For some of us, it will be work. It is not enjoyable to be reminded about difficult experiences. However,… Continue reading Blog Series: Spiritual Abuse in the Church: A Guide to Recognition and Recovery by Pastor Ken Garrett, Wk 2

Authoritative Preaching, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, C.J. Mahaney, Chuck O'Neal, Extra-Biblical Nonsense, Julie Anne's Personal Stories, Legalism, Misuse of Scripture, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies, Troubling Tweets

How our Pastor’s Biblical Interpretation Can Affect Our Understanding of Scripture and God

*** This is a very insightful statement from C.J. Mahaney.   https://twitter.com/CJMahaney/status/739414015546404864 When a pastor preaches,  he is leading his congregation in his interpretation of Scripture. It may or may not be correct. I know from reading many personal stories of those who were Mahaney's church that his teachings caused spiritual harm. I don't think… Continue reading How our Pastor’s Biblical Interpretation Can Affect Our Understanding of Scripture and God

Abuse Systems and Transformation Tools, Authoritative Preaching, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, Chuck O'Neal, Dictators, Doctrine as Idol, Doug Wilson, Grace Community Church, Harvest Bible Chapel, James MacDonald, John MacArthur, Julie Anne's Personal Stories, Leaving the Church, Legalism, Recovery Process, Shunning, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies

Help! My Family Member or Close Friend is Trapped in a High-Controlling Church or Cult. How Can I Encourage Them to Leave?

How to help a family member or friend leave a high-controlling church group or cult: spiritual abuse, trapped, thought reform, mind control, freedom   “Mind control is the process by which individual or collective freedom of choice and action is compromised by agents or agencies that modify or distort perception, motivation, affect, cognition and/or behavioral… Continue reading Help! My Family Member or Close Friend is Trapped in a High-Controlling Church or Cult. How Can I Encourage Them to Leave?

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Christian Marriage, Divorce, Domestic Violence, Domestic Violence and Churches, Failure to Report Crimes, Feminist Agenda, It's All About the Image, Legalism, Marriage, Marriages Damaged-Destroyed by Sp. Ab., Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Spiritual Abuse, Women and the Church

Domestic Violence is NOT a Marriage Issue, but an Abuse Issue

Domestic Violence, Naghmeh and Saeed Abedini, Divorce, Marriage, Abuse, Church Response to Abuse   Earlier today, I participated in a discussion at  SharperIron.org. The discussion is about Saeed and Naghmeh Abedini and domestic violence. A commenter, dmyers, is having trouble with Naghmeh's earlier statements, challenging her claims of abuse, etc. I have an assignment due in… Continue reading Domestic Violence is NOT a Marriage Issue, but an Abuse Issue

Authoritative Preaching, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, BGBC Lawsuit, Chuck O'Neal, Doctrine as Idol, Gender Roles, Julie Anne's Personal Stories, Legalism, Parenting, Patriarchal-Complementarian Movement, Personal Stories, Recovery Process, Safe Churches, Spiritual Abuse, SPIRITUAL ABUSE RECOVERY, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies, SPIRITUAL SOUNDING BOARD, SURVIVOR STORIES

The Fallout of Spiritual Abuse on Our Children

Children Harmed by Spiritual Abuse   Yesterday, I was talking with my programming language tutor and mentioned that I had a blog. He asked what my blog was about and I told him the long story. He was absolutely dumbfounded by what he was hearing and kept shaking his head, not wanting to believe it, even… Continue reading The Fallout of Spiritual Abuse on Our Children

ABUSE RECOVERY PROCESS-PROBLEMS, ABUSIVE FAITH & PRACTICE, Authoritative Preaching, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, Chuck O'Neal, Crazy Things Church Leaders Say & Do, Doctrine as Idol, Extra-Biblical Nonsense, Julie Anne's Personal Stories, Leaving the Church, Legalism, Meetings with the Pastor, Misuse of Scripture, Narcissistic Pastors, Personal Stories, Spiritual Bullies, SURVIVOR STORIES

Spiritual Abuse: What Was the Last Straw That Caused You to Leave Your Abusive Church?

Spiritual Abuse - What finally made you realize you had to leave your church? *** *** I had already told my husband that I had to leave BGBC, with or without him, but I was hoping that he would come to the same conclusion without my influence. That finally happened after our close friend who was… Continue reading Spiritual Abuse: What Was the Last Straw That Caused You to Leave Your Abusive Church?

Bill Gothard, Christian Marriage, Courtship, Divorce, Full-Quiver, Gender Roles, Homeschool Movement, IBLP and ATI, Legalism, Modesty and Purity Teachings, Patriarchal-Complementarian Movement, Personal Stories, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Women and the Church

How has the Josh Duggar Scandal affected you? Are you experiencing painful reminders?

Josh Duggar, sex scandal, painful reminders, homeschool movement, patriarchy, purity and modesty culture, Bill Gothard *** *** With the recent disclosure of sexual infidelity by Josh Duggar, I have been noticing a lot of people who have been influenced by Patriarchy, Quiverfull, Bill Gothard, Homeschool Movement, etc, trying to make sense of what is going… Continue reading How has the Josh Duggar Scandal affected you? Are you experiencing painful reminders?