Book Review Series, Christian Marriage, Complementarianism, Doctrine as Idol, Domestic Violence, Domestic Violence and Churches, Gender Roles, Marriage, Martha Peace, Spiritual Abuse

Book Review Series – “The Excellent Wife” by Martha Peace – Chapter Thirteen – Submission Provides Protection?

It’s obvious that in Peace’s world of submission, a husband can behave any way he likes without consequence; otherwise, options would be given to wives for how to deal with abusive behaviors.

Domestic Violence

Domestic Violence Awareness Month – Safety Planning

Safety plans are helpful for victims/survivors at different points of time. Safety plans help victims/survivors to think through ways to stay safe while in a harmful situation or navigate after leaving an abusive relationship. One thing that I have learned from listening to people is that survivors always have to be on the offensive. It's… Continue reading Domestic Violence Awareness Month – Safety Planning

Book Review Series, Christian Marriage, Complementarianism, Doctrine as Idol, Domestic Violence, Gender Roles, Martha Peace, Spiritual Abuse

Book Review Series – “The Excellent Wife” by Martha Peace – Chapter Twelve – Setting the Stage for Submission

This book has already focused so much on submission, but for some reason Peace has at least two more chapters left on this topic. It makes me wonder if she is trying to convince herself that her theology is that good by saying it over and over and over.

Divorce, Domestic Violence, Domestic Violence and Churches, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Women and the Church

Pastor Neil Schori Urges Pastors and Church Leaders to Get it Right about Domestic Violence

If church leaders are counseling abused spouses to go back to their abusive partners because they don't meet the church-approved "divorce criteria," they are contributing to the abuse by placing survivors in harm's way.

Domestic Violence, Domestic Violence and Churches, Marriage, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches

Domestic Violence: A Call to Pastors – Documentation to Help Domestic Violence Victims

This is one practical way that a pastor can help a domestic violence victim - by providing a letter stating that she is needing time off work or a safety accommodation to deal with domestic violence-related issues.

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Clergy Misconduct, Domestic Violence, Mark Driscoll, Owen Strachan, Troubling Tweets, Tullian Tchividjian

Twitter Twaddles and Truths

Sometimes there are tweets that really need to be seen wider than the Twitterverse. I will be compiling tweets to highlight here.

Book Review Series, Christian Marriage, Domestic Violence, Marriage, Martha Peace, Spiritual Abuse

Book Review Series – “The Excellent Wife” by Martha Peace – Chapter Eleven – Mutual Sex or Sex on Demand?

In so many of the godly wife books we see that the wife's duty is to provide sex for her husband whenever he wants it. At least she identifies that a wife has a desire and need for sex.

Book Review Series, Christian Marriage, Complementarianism, Doctrine as Idol, Domestic Violence, Gender Roles, Marriage, Martha Peace, Spiritual Abuse

Book Review Series – “The Excellent Wife” by Martha Peace – Chapter Ten – R.E.S.P.E.C.T., Find Out What it Means to MP

Peace likens the wife's position to her husband as a soldier to his superior officer, which leads to the biggest problem I have with this chapter: the husband being viewed as the position of authority and the wife respecting her husband because of that position.

Book Review Series, Christian Marriage, Complementarianism, Doctrine as Idol, Domestic Violence, Gender Roles, Marriage, Marriages Damaged-Destroyed by Sp. Ab., Martha Peace, Spiritual Abuse

Book Review Series – “The Excellent Wife” by Martha Peace – Chapter Nine – Putting on Love

A Christian wife should not be led to believe that she is undeserving of living in a healthy, harm-free relationship.

Book Review Series, Christian Marriage, Complementarianism, Doctrine as Idol, Domestic Violence, Domestic Violence and Churches, Gender Roles, Martha Peace, Spiritual Abuse, Women and the Church

Book Review Series – “The Excellent Wife” by Martha Peace – Chapter Seven – False Idols and Faking Joy

I honestly don't understand how a wife expecting her husband to treat her with respect, kindness, and love is an idol.

Book Review Series, Christian Marriage, Complementarianism, Doctrine as Idol, Domestic Violence, Domestic Violence and Churches, Gender Roles, Marriage, Martha Peace, Spiritual Abuse

Book Review Series – “The Excellent Wife” by Martha Peace – Chapter Five: Wives, if You Experience Abuse, Acknowledge Your Sin

"A wife who is a victim of abuse should not be forced to think about how her "sinful actions" contributed to abuse. This constant reminder of sin can keep a victim trapped in an abusive marriage longer than she should be."

Book Review Series, Christian Marriage, Domestic Violence, Gender Roles, Marriage, Marriages Damaged-Destroyed by Sp. Ab., Martha Peace, Spiritual Abuse

Book Review Series – “The Excellent Wife” by Martha Peace – Chapter 4: Doing Your Minimal Duty to God

"You may be thinking, "I'm willing to work at having a close relationship with my husband, but he is not." If he is unwilling to communicate or is cruel and yet you respond in a godly manner, you will be suffering for righteousness sake and God will meet your needs." ~Martha Peace

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Clergy Misconduct, Crazy Things Church Leaders Say & Do, Domestic Violence, Domestic Violence and Churches, Harvest Bible Chapel, James MacDonald, Leaving the Church, Narcissistic Pastors, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies

Harvest Bible Chapel’s Pastor James MacDonald is OUT; the Painful Personal Stories Left in the Wake

Well, he finally did enough damage that even his elders cannot cover this up. James MacDonald was caught saying despicable and cruel things on a recording which was aired by Chicago-area radio personality and former Harvest Bible Chapel congregant, "Mancow" Muller. on WLS/AM 890. And he was fired!

Addressing Abuse, Christian Marriage, Complementarianism, Doctrine as Idol, Domestic Violence, Lori Alexander, Marriage, Spiritual Abuse, The Transformed Wife

Lori Alexander Shares Thoughts on Verbal Abuse

"Verbal abuse needs to be taken as seriously as physical abuse. Just because you can't see the effects of verbal abuse doesn't mean that it's not as damaging."

Addressing Abuse, Christian Marriage, Complementarianism, Doctrine as Idol, Domestic Violence, Domestic Violence and Churches, Gender Roles, Lori Alexander, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Bullies, The Transformed Wife

In Which Ken Gaslights and Lori Thinks Women can Avoid Marrying Abusers

"Lori could stand to learn about abusers before placing the onus of marrying one on a woman."

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Abuse Systems and Transformation Tools, Christian Marriage, Divorce, Domestic Violence, Marriages Damaged-Destroyed by Sp. Ab., Saeed Abedini, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Spiritual Abuse

Naghmeh Panahi, Ex-Wife of Former Iranian Prisoner, “Pastor” Saeed Abedini, Posts Public Statement on Facebook

It's been a while since I have posted about Saeed Abedini or his ex-wife, Naghmeh. Naghmeh Panahi posted a public note on Facebook yesterday. You may recall that after Saeed Abedini was released from prison in Iran, Naghmeh filed for separation because Saeed would not get help for his abusive behavior in the marriage. Saeed… Continue reading Naghmeh Panahi, Ex-Wife of Former Iranian Prisoner, “Pastor” Saeed Abedini, Posts Public Statement on Facebook

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Christian Industrial Complex, Crazy Things Church Leaders Say & Do, Divorce, Domestic Violence, Emergent/Progressive Movement

Tony Jones Book Update, Christian Industrial Complex, and Domestic Violence

Tony Jones, Emergent, THE NEW CHRISTIANS: DISPATCHES FROM THE EMERGENT FRONTIER, Anniversary, Christian Industrial Complex ***   October is National Domestic Violence Awareness month in the US, and so this article is timely. The last time I wrote about popular emergent leader, Tony Jones, was in 2015 in this article, A Spider Web of Emergent Leader… Continue reading Tony Jones Book Update, Christian Industrial Complex, and Domestic Violence

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, ABUSE RECOVERY PROCESS-PROBLEMS, Bill Gothard, Calvinism, Christian Marriage, Domestic Violence, Homeschool Movement, Personal Stories

Woman Feels Spiritually Trapped after Having Grown up in a Conservative Reformed Christian Homeschool Family

I found Ann's comment (below) in moderation, but felt it deserved a wider audience than where it was intended to be posted. Ann's story most certainly is not unique. Her struggle goes along with the previous two posts on abuse in marriage, but is compounded with a childhood of teachings that have been harmful to… Continue reading Woman Feels Spiritually Trapped after Having Grown up in a Conservative Reformed Christian Homeschool Family

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Christian Marriage, Divorce, Domestic Violence, Domestic Violence and Churches, Personal Stories, Stories of Hope

An Abusive Marriage, Well-Meaning Christians, and God’s Word

*** I ran across a post on Facebook that a friend wrote. Flo Fromer-Wedding posted about the spiritual tug-of-war process she went through while she was in an abusive marriage.  Unfortunately, the church is often a volatile place for abused women to get help, especially when there is greater emphasis on the "covenant of marriage,"… Continue reading An Abusive Marriage, Well-Meaning Christians, and God’s Word