While I was reporting on abuse in the church in 2012 on this blog, this is what I was living in my home. And while I was sharing stories of domestic violence, including emotional abuse and spiritual abuse here, I was connecting with these stories in a personal way, weeping, and knowing one day, I'd be telling my own story here. The time is now.
Category: Domestic Violence
My Church Leaders Were Abusive: Should I share my story publicly with Christian media? Is there something I can do that will affect positive change?
. . we can't change the culture of an abusive church, because while an abusive leader is in power, there is a system of abuse involved. We cannot change an abusive system. But what we survivors can do is provide a safe place where personal stories are told, heard, believed.
ACBC’s Consideration of the Duluth Model
Could the real reason for this podcast be that ACBC counselors are finding something useful from an outside source when talking to victims of domestic violence?
Domestic Violence Awareness Month – Resources for Pastors and Churches
October is National Domestic Violence Awareness Month. This post lists several resources for churches and pastors to use when thinking about responding to domestic abuse.
The Who’s Who and What’s What of Poisonous Patriarchy in Contemporary Christianity: Introducing Brian Sauvé
This power-over structure is harmful, demeaning, and depersonalizes women who were made in the Image of God.
The Who’s Who and What’s What of Poisonous Patriarchy in Contemporary Christianity
"I’ve decided to document pastors and individuals who promote patriarchy here on my blog. I will post screenshots of their tweets or social media posts, and name them and their churches as a public record."
John Piper on Complementarianism and Abuse – #T4G20
What is up with John Piper's erratic response on Complementarianism and abuse?
Book Review Series – "The Excellent Wife" by Martha Peace – Chapter Twenty-One – Who Knew Sorrow and Grief Could be Sinful
This chapter is supposed to help a wife who is grieving over her husband's sinful actions. Interestingly, nothing specifically points to how a wife can manage her grief or sorrow.
Book Review Series – “The Excellent Wife” by Martha Peace – Chapter Twenty – When Desiring Intimacy is Idolatrous
In this chapter, Martha Peace lets wives know it's their problem if they feel lonely when their husbands isolate them.
Book Review Series – “The Excellent Wife” by Martha Peace – Chapter Nineteen – Never Fear, the Lord is Near
In this chapter wives are told that fear is associated is sinful and indicates a lack of trust in God.
Spiritual Abuse & Domestic Violence – A Call for Stories
Requesting stories for a training opportunity for victim advocates.
Book Review Series – “The Excellent Wife” by Martha Peace – Chapter Seventeen – Conflicts and Lists
Wives, please don't hold on to the destructive teaching that God has a purpose and plan for abuse that happens to you.
Blaming Abuse on Satan is Not Enough
It's time for Focus on the Family to start acknowledging abuse happens in Christian marriages.
Book Review Series – “The Excellent Wife” by Martha Peace – Chapter Sixteen – Watch Your Words
This chapter is full of conflicting important points and is a reminder that verbal and emotional abuse is not appropriate.
Book Review Series – “The Excellent Wife” by Martha Peace – Chapter Fifteen – One Long, Unmotivating List
In this chapter, the author provides a list of ways wives are motivated to honor Christ in submission to their husbands. I'm motivated to cut out as much from the list as possible. ~Kathi
Domestic Violence Survivor Responds to Wayne Grudem’s Change of Opinion on “Allowing” Divorce for Abuse in Marriage
Next time you meet a divorced survivor, look in her eyes with kindness and ask yourself how bad it had to be to risk all she did.
Book Review Series – “The Excellent Wife” by Martha Peace – Chapter Fourteen – A Wife’s Orderly Way to Respond to Her Husband’s Evil Responses
How does a Christian wife respond to her husband's evil behavior? This orderly list provides more harm than help.
Pastors and Church Leaders: do you know who is in your audience? Well-intentioned sermons may be harmful to survivors.
Please preach and communicate as if one in three women listening in your audience are victims of domestic violence.
Book Review Series – “The Excellent Wife” by Martha Peace – Chapter Thirteen – Submission Provides Protection?
It’s obvious that in Peace’s world of submission, a husband can behave any way he likes without consequence; otherwise, options would be given to wives for how to deal with abusive behaviors.
Domestic Violence Awareness Month – Safety Planning
Safety plans are helpful for victims/survivors at different points of time. Safety plans help victims/survivors to think through ways to stay safe while in a harmful situation or navigate after leaving an abusive relationship. One thing that I have learned from listening to people is that survivors always have to be on the offensive. It's… Continue reading Domestic Violence Awareness Month – Safety Planning
