. . we can't change the culture of an abusive church, because while an abusive leader is in power, there is a system of abuse involved. We cannot change an abusive system. But what we survivors can do is provide a safe place where personal stories are told, heard, believed.
Category: Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches
We Now See the Fruit of Doug Wilson’s Teachings on Marital Sex: Personal Accounts of Marital Rape
Let me be blunt: I believe Douglas Wilson has given the green light for all “Christian” men to sexually violate or rape their wives. Men penetrate, conquer, colonize, plant; women must receive, surrender, and accept.
To Mark Gungor: There is Nothing Inspiring about using “Humor” to Publicly Degrade Women; and Please Do Better on Sex Abuse Cases
There should be no place in Christian evangelicalism for Mark Gungor's behavior which devalues, disrespects, and demoralizes women. If Gungor is allowed to continue having platforms, then it is a clear picture that Christian evangelicalism is not, and probably has never been, a safe place for women.
Julie Anne Smith Interviewed on Almost Heretical Podcast: Spiritual and Sexual Abuse
Nate is the first person to interview me specifically about the Ravi Zacharias sex abuse scandal and ask me why I thought it took so long for the collective church to "get it."
Ravi Zacharias: Reports of Sexual Predation and Sexual Abuse at Health Spas
And now, Steve Baughman has uncovered more of the same . . . Ravi has a history of seeking sexual gratification for himself, using his position of power and trust to obtain those "favors." This is clergy sexual misconduct and spiritual abuse!
The Who’s Who and What’s What of Poisonous Patriarchy in Contemporary Christianity: Introducing Brian Sauvé
This power-over structure is harmful, demeaning, and depersonalizes women who were made in the Image of God.
Update on Dr. Wes Feltner of Berean Baptist and Clergy Sexual Misconduct
At the very least, we should have seen Feltner take responsibility for his clergy sexual misconduct. That never happened...
Pastor Neil Schori Urges Pastors and Church Leaders to Get it Right about Domestic Violence
If church leaders are counseling abused spouses to go back to their abusive partners because they don't meet the church-approved "divorce criteria," they are contributing to the abuse by placing survivors in harm's way.
Is J.D. Greear just talking, or are we going to see action?
The SBC has been getting push back about selecting "designated survivors" to speak. Was he doing damage control by mentioning the names of the survivors/advocates they chose not to speak? Were the ones chosen to speak selected so that the SBC can control the narrative?
Domestic Violence: A Call to Pastors – Documentation to Help Domestic Violence Victims
This is one practical way that a pastor can help a domestic violence victim - by providing a letter stating that she is needing time off work or a safety accommodation to deal with domestic violence-related issues.
Reader Comments on My Bitterness and Hatred for Posting about Tullian Tchividjian’s Clergy Sexual Misconduct
What Tullian did was disgusting. But I am telling you, Julie Anne, your relentless pursuit of this story is not helping in the compassionate stand-up-for-justice way you think it is. My prayer is that your eyes are opened to the bitterness and hate that you are catering to, and how anti-Christian this material is.
UN-accountable: Case Study in Systems Analysis and Ministerial Accountability ~ Part 5, Accountability Systems Breakdown
Part 5 focuses on the other side of Mr Tchividjian's misuse of his platform as a Christian celebrity minister, speaker, and writer – his accountability system victims: superiors, peers, and subordinates.
What courage must it have taken to publicly post a call for Tullian Tchividjian to repent? To apologize for having amplified his impact? To resign from the board of his newly resurrected non-profit? To remove from their ministry website various resources he'd produced? To cancel contracts that would extend his influence?
What did it cost those who were close to him in terms of ministry – especially those who held authority to oversee his recovery plans, and those who'd been his platform peers?
These are the kinds of questions we should consider as we read this final piece in the case study of Tullian Tchividjian and the details of his abuse of systems, ministry, and accountability ...
UN-accountable: Case Study in Systems Analysis and Ministerial Accountability ~ Part 4, Accountability
It’s not the job of any supervisor, peer, or subordinate to prevent Tullian Tchividjian from sinning, whether he does so mildly or spectacularly. It wasn’t the role of his non-profit board, church sessions, publishing house legal departments, counselors, friends, etc. It’s not even possible. He himself is responsible for his own choices and their impact.
UN-accountable: Case Study in Systems Analysis and Ministerial Accountability ~ Part 3, Industrial Complex
... there were over 150 individuals in at least 10 institutions who had direct connections with Tullian Tchividjian as his superiors, peers, or subordinates. And yet, it seems nobody could keep him from his two extramarital sexual involvements he has already admitted to (after they were discovered or disclosed), or from his reported predatory/seductive behavior patterns, or from his reported multiple failures to tell the full truth.
UN-accountable: Case Study in Systems Analysis and Ministerial Accountability ~ Part 2, Repair
What does real-world remediation / repentance look like? How can we see what it takes in both attitudes and actions to accomplish damage repair? This post gives three examples of remediation (repair work) — one dealing with a product, one with a denominational organization, one with a social system. Each is notable for seeking to engage in a constructive way parties who were directly involved, and in some cases those who were indirectly affected.
UN-accountable: Case Study in Systems Analysis and Ministerial Accountability ~ Part 1, Systems
Systemic abuse always includes a degree of relational manipulation to get/keep people hooked in, as well as deception in order to hide the truth.
Why is there an admission charge for people who want to attend ERLC’s Caring Well Conference?
SBC has failed miserably with sex abuse cover-ups. This a conference where YOU have to pay to attend hear people discuss issues in which THEY (SBC) have failed. This is messed up. It should be free. #SBC #churchtoo Quote Tweet
My Thoughts: Josh Harris (I Kissed Dating Good-bye) and His Wife, Shannon, Announce Marital Separation
But it makes me once again question those ideologies that led up to this point. It makes me think about spiritual abuse. It makes me think about Patriarchy. What significant changes were made in their journey? What ideologies did each one keep, and each one ditch?
Cissie Graham Lynch – Publicly Criticizing Pastors or Ministries Destroys the Gospel
If we do not publicly call out abusive or neglectful church leaders or ministries then abuse thrives. Silence and privacy is not an option.
Well Done, Church Leaders: Grace Family Baptist Church Pastors Handle Sex Abuse Case of Alleged Pedophile Pastor Stephen Bratton Appropriately
"The elders have called upon Stephen Bratton to accept the full responsibility for his actions and to place himself at the mercy of the criminal justice system."