"No ONE should tell EVERYONE anything. That's the role of your leaders. We are entrusted, and we're going to give an account."
Category: Meetings with the Pastor
Sovereign Grace Church Leaders Remove Wife from Women’s Small Group Leader Position after Couple Asks Questions
*** Both Jeff Owens and his wife Sarah recently sent out a thread of tweets regarding a recent experience they had at their former (unidentified) Sovereign Grace church. I think these tweets deserve a wider audience. What you will read is not healthy at all, and people need to understand the dismissive and bullying behavior… Continue reading Sovereign Grace Church Leaders Remove Wife from Women’s Small Group Leader Position after Couple Asks Questions
A Personal Story and a Sad Conclusion When Pastors Failed to Respond Appropriately to Domestic Violence
Domestic violence, Church response, Rob Porter *** You may have heard in the news recently about Rob Porter who worked for President Trump in the White House. Porter recently resigned his position as White House Staff Secretary after allegations of domestic violence from his two ex-wives surfaced in the media. It was disheartening to hear… Continue reading A Personal Story and a Sad Conclusion When Pastors Failed to Respond Appropriately to Domestic Violence
Bethlehem Baptist Church Excommunicates Victim of Domestic Violence
Bethlehem Baptist Church, Domestic Violence, Emotional Abuse, Excommunication, Spiritual Abuse *** Over a year ago (November 1, 2016), I posted the article, 1-1/2 years Later, Bethlehem Baptist Church Doesn’t Seem to get Domestic Violence: A Personal Story. I have a followup to that article. For those who have never read the story, I will repost most of the… Continue reading Bethlehem Baptist Church Excommunicates Victim of Domestic Violence
First #MeToo, Now #ChurchToo: Sexual Abuse, Harassment, and Mishandling in the Church
#MeToo, #ChurchToo, Sexual Abuse, Harassment, Church *** The hashtag #MeToo has been trending for quite some time on Twitter. Women who have been sexually harassed or abused have been identifying themselves as survivors of sexual harm, indicating it with the hashtag, #MeToo. But now, there is a new trending hashtag, #ChurchToo. The stories that you… Continue reading First #MeToo, Now #ChurchToo: Sexual Abuse, Harassment, and Mishandling in the Church
Pastor Chuck O’Neal Continues to Pull the Wool over His Evangelist Friends’ Eyes
Chuck O'Neal, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, Jeff Rose, Dr. Edward Delcour, Mike Gendron, Mike Stockwell, and Robert Gray, Evangelism Reformation Conference, Reformation Fire Conference https://twitter.com/ChuckONeal_/status/883432785221894144 *** I don't have a problem with those tweets. On the surface, they are fine. But even false teachers get things right. The Bible tells us: For certain individuals whose… Continue reading Pastor Chuck O’Neal Continues to Pull the Wool over His Evangelist Friends’ Eyes
Spiritual Abuse: What Was the Last Straw That Caused You to Leave Your Abusive Church?
Spiritual Abuse - What finally made you realize you had to leave your church? *** *** I had already told my husband that I had to leave BGBC, with or without him, but I was hoping that he would come to the same conclusion without my influence. That finally happened after our close friend who was… Continue reading Spiritual Abuse: What Was the Last Straw That Caused You to Leave Your Abusive Church?
Pastor Chuck O’Neal of Beaverton Grace Bible Church Taught Parents to Spank Adult Children
Pastor Chuck O'Neal of Beaverton Grace Bible Church Taught Parents to Spank Adult Children One of the more challenging aspects about abuse is the recurring triggers, even years after abuse. In the strictest sense of the term, trigger is used to refer to experiences that “re-trigger” trauma in the form of flashbacks or… Continue reading Pastor Chuck O’Neal of Beaverton Grace Bible Church Taught Parents to Spank Adult Children
Insidious Behavior at The Village Church Regarding a Pedophile and His Former Wife
*** Horrific story of spiritual abuse, mishandling of sex abuse, church membership, Matt Chandler, The Village Church, Jordan Root, pedophile, child pornography *** I woke up late this morning and checked my Twitter feed to find that many of my Twitter friends were shocked and appalled at the treatment of Karen Hinkley (formerly Karen Root)… Continue reading Insidious Behavior at The Village Church Regarding a Pedophile and His Former Wife
The Lingering Pain of Spiritual Abuse
*** 2...Thus says the Lord God: Ah, shepherds of Israel who have been feeding yourselves! Should not shepherds feed the sheep? 3 You eat the fat, you clothe yourselves with the wool, you slaughter the fat ones, but you do not feed the sheep. 4 The weak you have not strengthened, the sick you have not healed,… Continue reading The Lingering Pain of Spiritual Abuse
Can High-Controlling Pastors Lead Their Members into Depression and Even Suicide?
Commenters share about high-controlling pastors who leave a path of mental health destruction, even suicide, because they cannot get appropriate help. A while back, I found a comment at SGMSurvivor.com blog that cut like a knife. Sovereign Grace Ministries (SGM) is in the news a good bit because of the sex abuse lawsuits, but the subject… Continue reading Can High-Controlling Pastors Lead Their Members into Depression and Even Suicide?
Pastoral Confidentiality: Does it Still Apply after Church Member Resigns?
*** What is the responsibility of pastors for those they deem have "gone astray?" Do pastoral confidentiality rules apply even when someone resigns their church membership? *** *** The other day, I read an article, Stabbed in the Back by a Cult Leader and it left me feeling sad and angry. "Sheldon" is a… Continue reading Pastoral Confidentiality: Does it Still Apply after Church Member Resigns?
When Sharing Concerns or Asking Pastors Questions Leads to Spiritual Abuse
* * * Questioning authority or raising concerns can be the litmus test to see if your pastor is spiritually abusive or not. * * * * * * Oh boy, is this a biggie. I was really moved when this topic come… Continue reading When Sharing Concerns or Asking Pastors Questions Leads to Spiritual Abuse
9Marks, Spiritual Abuse, and How Church Members Can Fall Through the Cracks
* * * Yesterday, I shared the a comment that I had posted on SharperIron.org forum. From my limited times there, I gather there are quite a few pastors. We were discussing 9Marks practices. Chip asked me to elaborate after reading my comment: I’ve read some of the 9Marks writings and some… Continue reading 9Marks, Spiritual Abuse, and How Church Members Can Fall Through the Cracks
Should We Speak out about Our Spiritually Abusive Church?
* * * This comment came in on an earlier thread and there are so many answers. Because I spoke out against my former church, one of the most common questions in e-mails I get is: "should I speak out about our abuse to current members?" Here it is again:… Continue reading Should We Speak out about Our Spiritually Abusive Church?
TGC & T4G: It’s Not about the Nail, it’s about the SGM Survivors!
* * * * * * Have you seen this video? I liked it enough that I posted it on my blog's Facebook page. The person who recommended it, Denny Burk, is one who has publicly given his support to C.J. Mahaney. Just a bit ago,… Continue reading TGC & T4G: It’s Not about the Nail, it’s about the SGM Survivors!
Church Disputes: Calvary Chapel Boise Pastor Bob Caldwell Sets Good Example
* * * There are a lot of sad church stories that come my way. Many times we discuss really difficult situations and happy endings cannot be found. Although this next story is not over, it is headed in a completely different direction than it was earlier. My friend and fellow… Continue reading Church Disputes: Calvary Chapel Boise Pastor Bob Caldwell Sets Good Example
Creepy Pastors and Churches Using Creepy Stalking Control Tactics
* * * There have been a few stories of spiritual abuse in the news lately. A kind reader sent me this article from The Christian Post: Spiritual Abuse: Shepherds – or Fleecers – of God's Flock? This article starts by discussing the abuse of gaining members' funds through… Continue reading Creepy Pastors and Churches Using Creepy Stalking Control Tactics
Additional Former Church Member Has Been Sued!
* * * I'll get to the subject of the former church member sued in just a moment, but want to make sure this point is told: I believe that suing former church members is just an extension of the spiritual abuse. How can that be? Let me explain.This is old… Continue reading Additional Former Church Member Has Been Sued!
"Justice" Responds
* * * FrederickaMay 17, 2012 11:07 AM I must confess myself mystified as to the nature of 'Justice's' complaint, which seems to be lacking in a certain, shall we say, precision. What exactly is it that he or she is alleging was done to him or her? AnonymousMay… Continue reading "Justice" Responds
