ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Abuse Systems and Transformation Tools, child abuse, Clergy Misconduct, Clergy Sex Abuse, It's All About the Image, Mandatory Reporting, Meetings with the Pastor, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Southern Baptist Convention, Spiritual Abuse, Statute of Limitations, Women and the Church

Is J.D. Greear just talking, or are we going to see action?

The SBC has been getting push back about selecting "designated survivors" to speak. Was he doing damage control by mentioning the names of the survivors/advocates they chose not to speak? Were the ones chosen to speak selected so that the SBC can control the narrative?

Harvest Bible Chapel, James MacDonald, Learn to Discern, Meetings with the Pastor, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority

Learn to Discern: Pastor from Harvest Bible Chapel Speaks at Church Meeting – What Do His Words Really Say?

"No ONE should tell EVERYONE anything. That's the role of your leaders. We are entrusted, and we're going to give an account."

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, C.J. Mahaney, CHURCH GOVERNANCE & POLICIES, Church Governance or Policy Issues, Clergy Misconduct, Clergy Sex Abuse, Failure to Report Crimes, Leaving the Church, Mandatory Reporting, Meetings with the Pastor, Personal Stories, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Sovereign Grace Ministries, Sovereign Grace Ministries Lawsuit, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies, Troubling Tweets

Sovereign Grace Church Leaders Remove Wife from Women’s Small Group Leader Position after Couple Asks Questions

*** Both Jeff Owens and his wife Sarah recently sent out a thread of tweets regarding a recent experience they had at their former (unidentified)  Sovereign Grace church. I think these tweets deserve a wider audience. What you will read is not healthy at all, and people need to understand the dismissive and bullying behavior… Continue reading Sovereign Grace Church Leaders Remove Wife from Women’s Small Group Leader Position after Couple Asks Questions

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Christian Marriage, Divorce, Domestic Violence, Domestic Violence and Churches, Failure to Report Crimes, Leaving the Church, Marriage, Meetings with the Pastor, Personal Stories, Women and the Church

A Personal Story and a Sad Conclusion When Pastors Failed to Respond Appropriately to Domestic Violence

Domestic violence, Church response, Rob Porter *** You may have heard in the news recently about Rob Porter who worked for President Trump in the White House. Porter recently resigned his position as White House Staff Secretary after allegations of domestic violence from his two ex-wives surfaced in the media. It was disheartening to hear… Continue reading A Personal Story and a Sad Conclusion When Pastors Failed to Respond Appropriately to Domestic Violence

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Church Discipline Process, Crazy Things Church Leaders Say & Do, Divorce, Domestic Violence, Domestic Violence and Churches, Extra-Biblical Nonsense, Leaving the Church, Marriage, Meetings with the Pastor, Personal Stories, Spiritual Bullies, Women and the Church

Bethlehem Baptist Church Excommunicates Victim of Domestic Violence

Bethlehem Baptist Church, Domestic Violence, Emotional Abuse, Excommunication, Spiritual Abuse *** Over a year ago (November 1, 2016), I posted the article, 1-1/2 years Later, Bethlehem Baptist Church Doesn’t Seem to get Domestic Violence: A Personal Story. I have a followup to that article. For those who have never read the story, I will repost most of the… Continue reading Bethlehem Baptist Church Excommunicates Victim of Domestic Violence

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Christian Marriage, Clergy Misconduct, Clergy Sex Abuse, Crazy Things Church Leaders Say & Do, Domestic Violence, Domestic Violence and Churches, Failure to Report Crimes, It's All About the Image, Leaving the Church, Mandatory Reporting, Meetings with the Pastor, Mental Health and the Church, No-Talk Rule, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Bullies, Statute of Limitations

First #MeToo, Now #ChurchToo: Sexual Abuse, Harassment, and Mishandling in the Church

#MeToo, #ChurchToo, Sexual Abuse, Harassment, Church *** The hashtag #MeToo has been trending for quite some time on Twitter. Women who have been sexually harassed or abused have been identifying themselves as survivors of sexual harm, indicating it with the hashtag, #MeToo. But now, there is a new trending hashtag, #ChurchToo. The stories that you… Continue reading First #MeToo, Now #ChurchToo: Sexual Abuse, Harassment, and Mishandling in the Church

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, BGBC Google Reviews, BGBC Lawsuit, BGBCSurvivors Imposter Blog, Chuck O'Neal, Church Discipline Process, Evangelism, Extra-Biblical Nonsense, It's All About the Image, Legalism, Meetings with the Pastor, Misuse of Scripture, Narcissistic Pastors, No-Talk Rule, Shunning, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies

Pastor Chuck O’Neal Continues to Pull the Wool over His Evangelist Friends’ Eyes

Chuck O'Neal, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, Jeff Rose, Dr. Edward Delcour, Mike Gendron, Mike Stockwell, and Robert Gray, Evangelism Reformation Conference, Reformation Fire Conference https://twitter.com/ChuckONeal_/status/883432785221894144 *** I don't have a problem with those tweets. On the surface, they are fine. But even false teachers get things right. The Bible tells us: For certain individuals whose… Continue reading Pastor Chuck O’Neal Continues to Pull the Wool over His Evangelist Friends’ Eyes

ABUSE RECOVERY PROCESS-PROBLEMS, ABUSIVE FAITH & PRACTICE, Authoritative Preaching, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, Chuck O'Neal, Crazy Things Church Leaders Say & Do, Doctrine as Idol, Extra-Biblical Nonsense, Julie Anne's Personal Stories, Leaving the Church, Legalism, Meetings with the Pastor, Misuse of Scripture, Narcissistic Pastors, Personal Stories, Spiritual Bullies, SURVIVOR STORIES

Spiritual Abuse: What Was the Last Straw That Caused You to Leave Your Abusive Church?

Spiritual Abuse - What finally made you realize you had to leave your church? *** *** I had already told my husband that I had to leave BGBC, with or without him, but I was hoping that he would come to the same conclusion without my influence. That finally happened after our close friend who was… Continue reading Spiritual Abuse: What Was the Last Straw That Caused You to Leave Your Abusive Church?

Beaverton Grace Bible Church, BGBCSurvivors Imposter Blog, Biblical Counseling, Chuck O'Neal, Leaving the Church, Meetings with the Pastor, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Bullies

Pastor Chuck O’Neal of Beaverton Grace Bible Church Taught Parents to Spank Adult Children

Pastor Chuck O'Neal of Beaverton Grace Bible Church Taught Parents to Spank Adult Children     One of the more challenging aspects about abuse is the recurring triggers, even years after abuse. In the strictest sense of the term, trigger is used to refer to experiences that “re-trigger” trauma in the form of flashbacks or… Continue reading Pastor Chuck O’Neal of Beaverton Grace Bible Church Taught Parents to Spank Adult Children

Christian Marriage, CHURCH GOVERNANCE & POLICIES, Church Governance or Policy Issues, Crazy Things Church Leaders Say & Do, Divorce, Extra-Biblical Nonsense, Leaving the Church, Meetings with the Pastor, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Spiritual Bullies, Women and the Church

Insidious Behavior at The Village Church Regarding a Pedophile and His Former Wife

*** Horrific story of spiritual abuse, mishandling of sex abuse, church membership, Matt Chandler, The Village Church, Jordan Root, pedophile, child pornography *** I woke up late this morning and checked my Twitter feed to find that many of my Twitter friends were shocked and appalled at the treatment of Karen Hinkley (formerly Karen Root)… Continue reading Insidious Behavior at The Village Church Regarding a Pedophile and His Former Wife

Chuck O'Neal, Extra-Biblical Nonsense, Julie Anne's Personal Stories, Leaving the Church, Legalism, Meetings with the Pastor, Personal Stories, Recovery Process, Shunning, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Bullies, Stay-At-Home Daughters Movement, Street Evangelism, Young Earth Creation

The Lingering Pain of Spiritual Abuse

*** 2...Thus says the Lord God: Ah, shepherds of Israel who have been feeding yourselves! Should not shepherds feed the sheep? 3 You eat the fat, you clothe yourselves with the wool, you slaughter the fat ones, but you do not feed the sheep. 4 The weak you have not strengthened, the sick you have not healed,… Continue reading The Lingering Pain of Spiritual Abuse

Biblical Counseling, C.J. Mahaney, Chuck O'Neal, Emotional Responses, John MacArthur, Legalism, Meetings with the Pastor, Mental Health and the Church, Sovereign Grace Ministries, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Bullies, Suicide

Can High-Controlling Pastors Lead Their Members into Depression and Even Suicide?

  Commenters share about high-controlling pastors who leave a path of mental health destruction, even suicide, because they cannot get appropriate help.     A while back, I found a comment at SGMSurvivor.com blog that cut like a knife. Sovereign Grace Ministries (SGM) is in the news a good bit because of the sex abuse lawsuits, but the subject… Continue reading Can High-Controlling Pastors Lead Their Members into Depression and Even Suicide?

Church Governance or Policy Issues, Leaving the Church, Meetings with the Pastor, Mental Health and the Church, Parenting

Pastoral Confidentiality: Does it Still Apply after Church Member Resigns?

  *** What is the responsibility of pastors for those they deem have "gone astray?" Do pastoral confidentiality rules apply even when someone resigns their church membership? ***   *** The other day, I read an article, Stabbed in the Back by a Cult Leader and it left me feeling sad and angry. "Sheldon" is a… Continue reading Pastoral Confidentiality: Does it Still Apply after Church Member Resigns?

Christian Love, It's All About the Image, Leaving the Church, Marriages Damaged-Destroyed by Sp. Ab., Meetings with the Pastor, Misuse of Scripture, Narcissistic Pastors, No-Talk Rule, Personal Stories, Shunning, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Bullies

When Sharing Concerns or Asking Pastors Questions Leads to Spiritual Abuse

*     *     * Questioning authority or raising concerns can be the litmus test to see if your pastor is spiritually abusive or not. *     *     * *     *     * Oh boy, is this a biggie.  I was really moved when this topic come… Continue reading When Sharing Concerns or Asking Pastors Questions Leads to Spiritual Abuse

9Marks, Leaving the Church, Meetings with the Pastor, Shunning, Spiritual Abuse

9Marks, Spiritual Abuse, and How Church Members Can Fall Through the Cracks

*     *     * Yesterday, I shared the a comment that I had posted on SharperIron.org forum.  From my limited times there, I gather there are quite a few pastors.  We were discussing 9Marks practices.  Chip asked me to elaborate after reading my comment: I’ve read some of the 9Marks writings and some… Continue reading 9Marks, Spiritual Abuse, and How Church Members Can Fall Through the Cracks

Crazy Things Church Leaders Say & Do, It's All About the Image, Leaving the Church, Meetings with the Pastor, No-Talk Rule, Shunning, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Bullies

Should We Speak out about Our Spiritually Abusive Church?

*      *      * This comment came in on an earlier thread and there are so many answers.  Because I spoke out against my former church, one of the most common questions in e-mails I get is:  "should I speak out about our abuse to current members?"    Here it is again:… Continue reading Should We Speak out about Our Spiritually Abusive Church?

Failure to Report Crimes, Meetings with the Pastor, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Sovereign Grace Ministries, Sovereign Grace Ministries Lawsuit, The Gospel Coalition, Together for the Gospel

TGC & T4G: It’s Not about the Nail, it’s about the SGM Survivors!

*     *     * *     *     * Have you seen this video?   I liked it enough that I posted it on my blog's Facebook page.  The person who recommended it, Denny Burk, is one who has publicly given his support to C.J. Mahaney.  Just a bit ago,… Continue reading TGC & T4G: It’s Not about the Nail, it’s about the SGM Survivors!

Calvary Chapel Franchise, Calvary Chapel Lawsuit, Meetings with the Pastor

Church Disputes: Calvary Chapel Boise Pastor Bob Caldwell Sets Good Example

*     *    * There are a lot of sad church stories that come my way.   Many times we discuss really difficult situations and happy endings cannot be found.  Although this next story is not over, it is headed in a completely different direction than it was earlier.  My friend and fellow… Continue reading Church Disputes: Calvary Chapel Boise Pastor Bob Caldwell Sets Good Example

11 Hours of Meetings, ABUSERS & THEIR TACTICS, BGBC Google Reviews, BGBC Lawsuit, Crazy Things Church Leaders Say & Do, Dictators, It's All About the Image, Meetings with the Pastor, Narcissistic Pastors, No-Talk Rule, Shunning, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Bullies

Creepy Pastors and Churches Using Creepy Stalking Control Tactics

*     *     * There have been a few stories of spiritual abuse in the news lately.  A kind reader sent me this article from The Christian Post:   Spiritual Abuse: Shepherds – or Fleecers – of God's Flock?   This article starts by discussing the abuse of gaining members' funds through… Continue reading Creepy Pastors and Churches Using Creepy Stalking Control Tactics

BGBC Google Reviews, BGBC Lawsuit, Crazy Things Church Leaders Say & Do, It's All About the Image, Meetings with the Pastor, Narcissistic Pastors, No-Talk Rule, Shunning, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Bullies

Additional Former Church Member Has Been Sued!

*     *     * I'll get to the subject of the former church member sued in just a moment, but want to make sure this point is told:  I believe that suing former church members is just an extension of the spiritual abuse.  How can that be?  Let me explain.This is old… Continue reading Additional Former Church Member Has Been Sued!