ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Clergy Misconduct, Crazy Things Church Leaders Say & Do, Domestic Violence, Domestic Violence and Churches, Harvest Bible Chapel, James MacDonald, Leaving the Church, Narcissistic Pastors, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies

Harvest Bible Chapel’s Pastor James MacDonald is OUT; the Painful Personal Stories Left in the Wake

Well, he finally did enough damage that even his elders cannot cover this up. James MacDonald was caught saying despicable and cruel things on a recording which was aired by Chicago-area radio personality and former Harvest Bible Chapel congregant, "Mancow" Muller. on WLS/AM 890. And he was fired!

Book Review Series, Christian Marriage, Complementarianism, Doctrine as Idol, Gender Roles, Marriage, Martha Peace, Spiritual Abuse, Women and the Church

Book Review Series – “The Excellent Wife” by Martha Peace – Chapter 2: Carefully Placing Wives in a Box

Book Review Series, The Excellent Wife, Martha Peace, Complementarianism -by Kathi This is a book review series of The Excellent Wife by Martha Peace. If you are just joining us, you may click on previous chapter reviews if you’d like to catch up. Chapter One **** Chapter Two - A Wife's Understanding of God: God's Protective Authority Peace… Continue reading Book Review Series – “The Excellent Wife” by Martha Peace – Chapter 2: Carefully Placing Wives in a Box

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH

Spiritual Abuse: Stop Being so Bitter

Spiritual Abuse, ReputationJonathan Hollingsworth This is the fifth blog post referring to an article by Jonathan Hollingsworth, What Not to Say to Someone Who’s Been Hurt by the Church. The article resonated with a lot of people, so I thought it might be a good idea to discuss these unhelpful statements one by one here, and give… Continue reading Spiritual Abuse: Stop Being so Bitter

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Clergy Misconduct, Clergy Sex Abuse, Failure to Report Crimes, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies

Spiritual Abuse: What Are Nonbelievers Going to Think?

Spiritual Abuse, ReputationJonathan Hollingsworth This is the fourth blog post referring to an article by Jonathan Hollingsworth, What Not to Say to Someone Who’s Been Hurt by the Church. The article resonated with a lot of people, so I thought it might be a good idea to discuss these unhelpful statements one by one here, and give… Continue reading Spiritual Abuse: What Are Nonbelievers Going to Think?

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Calvinism, Doctrine as Idol, Going Back to Church Again, John Piper, Mental Health and the Church, Personal Stories, Spiritual Abuse

Caution: Children and Predestination

Predestination and Children My friend, Ryan Stollar, posted this on his Facebook wall, and I was struck at how damaging Predestination can be to children, especially vulnerable children. Shoot, I think it could scare adults, too! Special thanks to Ryan for writing about this and giving me permission to share it.  ~ja First off, what… Continue reading Caution: Children and Predestination

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Abuse Systems and Transformation Tools, Christian Marriage, Divorce, Domestic Violence, Marriages Damaged-Destroyed by Sp. Ab., Saeed Abedini, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Spiritual Abuse

Naghmeh Panahi, Ex-Wife of Former Iranian Prisoner, “Pastor” Saeed Abedini, Posts Public Statement on Facebook

It's been a while since I have posted about Saeed Abedini or his ex-wife, Naghmeh. Naghmeh Panahi posted a public note on Facebook yesterday. You may recall that after Saeed Abedini was released from prison in Iran, Naghmeh filed for separation because Saeed would not get help for his abusive behavior in the marriage. Saeed… Continue reading Naghmeh Panahi, Ex-Wife of Former Iranian Prisoner, “Pastor” Saeed Abedini, Posts Public Statement on Facebook

Christian Marriage, Complementarianism, Doctrine as Idol, Emotional Responses, Gender Roles, Lori Alexander, The Transformed Wife

Spiritual Abuse: Lori Alexander Says Working Women with Disabled Husbands Should Know Where They Belong

-by Kathi We haven't looked at Lori Alexander's "older woman" teachings for a while because not much has changed. Yesterday's doodle stood out to me, though, and offered another prime example of how Lori continues to pile on spiritual abuse. Text reads: Many women want to continually discredit God's clear commands to them. "My husband… Continue reading Spiritual Abuse: Lori Alexander Says Working Women with Disabled Husbands Should Know Where They Belong

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH

Spiritual Abuse: It’s Not Gossip to Talk about Abuse!

Spiritual Abuse, Gossip, Jonathan Hollingsworth   This is the third blog post referring to an article by Jonathan Hollingsworth, What Not to Say to Someone Who’s Been Hurt by the Church. The article resonated with a lot of people, so I thought it might be a good idea to discuss these unhelpful statements one by one here,… Continue reading Spiritual Abuse: It’s Not Gossip to Talk about Abuse!

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Recovery Process, Spiritual Abuse, SPIRITUAL ABUSE RECOVERY, Spiritual Bullies

Spiritual Abuse: When People Ask You, “Are You Working Toward Reconciliation?”

Spiritual Abuse, What Not to Say, Jonathan Hollingsworth, Reconciliation   This is the second blog post referring to an article by Jonathan Hollingsworth, What Not to Say to Someone Who’s Been Hurt by the Church. The article resonated with a lot of people, so I thought it might be a good idea to discuss these unhelpful statements… Continue reading Spiritual Abuse: When People Ask You, “Are You Working Toward Reconciliation?”

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Addressing Abuse, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority

Spiritual Abuse: When People Tell You, “No Church is Perfect”

Spiritual Abuse, What Not to Say, Jonathan Hollingsworth   Being hurt at church is tough, and sometimes it's a lonely journey. You may have experienced something that other congregants have not experienced. Some people may have good intentions, but say things that are not helpful, and in fact, may be hurtful. This can lead to… Continue reading Spiritual Abuse: When People Tell You, “No Church is Perfect”

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, BGBC Google Reviews, BGBC Lawsuit, Chuck O'Neal, JULIE ANNE'S CASE, Leaving the Church, Legalism, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Bullies

Negative Google Reviews are Still Keeping People Away from My Spiritually Abusive Church 6 Years after Lawsuit

Chuck O'Neal, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, Spiritual Abuse, Negative Google Reviews, Defamation Lawsuit     The other day, I got a call from my good friend, Michelle, who used to attend the cult/church we attended. Her husband used to be on staff at the church (Beaverton Grace Bible Church) and was fired. That led to… Continue reading Negative Google Reviews are Still Keeping People Away from My Spiritually Abusive Church 6 Years after Lawsuit

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, ABUSE RECOVERY PROCESS-PROBLEMS, Bill Gothard, Calvinism, Christian Marriage, Domestic Violence, Homeschool Movement, Personal Stories

Woman Feels Spiritually Trapped after Having Grown up in a Conservative Reformed Christian Homeschool Family

I found Ann's comment (below) in moderation, but felt it deserved a wider audience than where it was intended to be posted. Ann's story most certainly is not unique. Her struggle goes along with the previous two posts on abuse in marriage, but is compounded with a childhood of teachings that have been harmful to… Continue reading Woman Feels Spiritually Trapped after Having Grown up in a Conservative Reformed Christian Homeschool Family

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Crazy Things Church Leaders Say & Do, Doctrine as Idol, Learn to Discern, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Bullies, Troubling Tweets

What Does Responding Biblically Really Mean?

*** This will be short and sweet. I'm in the final crunch of school with only 2-1/2 weeks until graduation (woohoo!!). Responding Biblically seems to be thrown around a lot. I just tweeted this because I was thinking about a recent debate on Twitter (which I will write about when I get more time). ***… Continue reading What Does Responding Biblically Really Mean?

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, C.J. Mahaney, CHURCH GOVERNANCE & POLICIES, Church Governance or Policy Issues, Clergy Misconduct, Clergy Sex Abuse, Failure to Report Crimes, Leaving the Church, Mandatory Reporting, Meetings with the Pastor, Personal Stories, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Sovereign Grace Ministries, Sovereign Grace Ministries Lawsuit, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies, Troubling Tweets

Sovereign Grace Church Leaders Remove Wife from Women’s Small Group Leader Position after Couple Asks Questions

*** Both Jeff Owens and his wife Sarah recently sent out a thread of tweets regarding a recent experience they had at their former (unidentified)  Sovereign Grace church. I think these tweets deserve a wider audience. What you will read is not healthy at all, and people need to understand the dismissive and bullying behavior… Continue reading Sovereign Grace Church Leaders Remove Wife from Women’s Small Group Leader Position after Couple Asks Questions

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, C.J. Mahaney, Calvinism, Christian Marriage, Clergy Sex Abuse, Domestic Violence, Extra-Biblical Nonsense, Failure to Report Crimes, James Dobson, John MacArthur, Legalism, Mandatory Reporting, Mental Health and the Church, Personal Stories, Recovery Process, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Sovereign Grace Ministries, Spiritual Abuse, SURVIVOR STORIES, The Gospel Coalition, Women and the Church

Personal Story: What Did the Church Teach You about Yourself?

Spiritual abuse, sex abuse, patriarchy, domestic violence, Sovereign Grace, Desiring God, CJ Mahaney, John Piper, Mental Health *** *** Part of recovery from abusive churches is coming to grips with what you were taught and how it affected you. Sometimes, and very appropriately, the ability to see this clearly results in anger. Jennifer Michelle posted… Continue reading Personal Story: What Did the Church Teach You about Yourself?

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Bill Gothard, Bill Gothard & IBLP Lawsuit, Clergy Misconduct, Clergy Sex Abuse, IBLP and ATI, Personal Stories, SURVIVOR STORIES

From a Bill Gothard Survivor to Other Survivors: Free Yourselves

Bill Gothard, IBLP, ATI, Institutes in Basic Life Principles, Spiritual Abuse, Sexual Abuse *** The following was written by David Shere, who has been reading here for some time. He wanted to share his thoughts and advice as a Bill Gothard survivor.  This was written after the news that the plaintiffs had dismissed the lawsuit… Continue reading From a Bill Gothard Survivor to Other Survivors: Free Yourselves

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Julie Anne's Personal Stories, Personal Stories, Recovery Process, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority

Spiritual Abuse, PTSD, and the Aftermath

Spiritual Abuse, PTSD, Recovery, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, Chuck O'Neal *** When someone deals with spiritual abuse, it can have lasting consequences. One popular response is making the decision to no longer go an institutional church. I get that. I'm pretty sure I relayed the story either in a post, or in comments, that one… Continue reading Spiritual Abuse, PTSD, and the Aftermath

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Clergy Misconduct, Clergy Sex Abuse, Crazy Things Church Leaders Say & Do, It's All About the Image, Mark Driscoll, Tullian Tchividjian

Tullian Tchividjian and Mark Driscoll are Baaaack

Mark Driscoll, Tullian Tchividjian, Spiritual abuse, clergy sexual misconduct *** Tullian Tchividjian and Mark Driscoll are Baaaack Today was a really difficult day with the shootings in Las Vegas. As of this writing, 59 people have died, and over 500 injured. What a horrible, senseless tragedy, with so many people harmed. As I was reeling… Continue reading Tullian Tchividjian and Mark Driscoll are Baaaack

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Biblical Counseling, Guest Post, Master's University / Master's Seminary, Spiritual Bullies

Guest Post: If “Jane” from TMU were to seek “Biblical counseling” #DoYouSeeUs

Biblical Counseling, Nouthetic Counseling, "Jane" #DoYouSeeUs, John MacArthur, The Master's University   Rebecca Davis, who writes at Here's the Joy blog, has graciously allowed me to post her new article here. She has been a long-time friend of SSB. I really appreciate this article because in it, Rebecca describes the nouthetic, aka "Biblical counseling," process that… Continue reading Guest Post: If “Jane” from TMU were to seek “Biblical counseling” #DoYouSeeUs

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Emotional Responses, Leaving the Church, Personal Stories, Recovery Process, Spiritual Abuse, SPIRITUAL ABUSE RECOVERY, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies, Stories of Hope

Dr. Dan Allender: Trauma, Our Personal Stories, and Recovery through Music

Dr. Dan Allender, Trauma, Music, Spiritual Abuse Recovery, Personal Stories *** Those who have been reading here for a while know how important I believe it is for survivors to tell their abuse stories. It took a while for us to believe the lies our church leader(s) told us about who we are and who… Continue reading Dr. Dan Allender: Trauma, Our Personal Stories, and Recovery through Music