ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Church Discipline Process, Crazy Things Church Leaders Say & Do, Divorce, Domestic Violence, Domestic Violence and Churches, Extra-Biblical Nonsense, Leaving the Church, Marriage, Meetings with the Pastor, Personal Stories, Spiritual Bullies, Women and the Church

Bethlehem Baptist Church Excommunicates Victim of Domestic Violence

Bethlehem Baptist Church, Domestic Violence, Emotional Abuse, Excommunication, Spiritual Abuse *** Over a year ago (November 1, 2016), I posted the article, 1-1/2 years Later, Bethlehem Baptist Church Doesn’t Seem to get Domestic Violence: A Personal Story. I have a followup to that article. For those who have never read the story, I will repost most of the… Continue reading Bethlehem Baptist Church Excommunicates Victim of Domestic Violence

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Christian Marriage, Clergy Misconduct, Clergy Sex Abuse, Crazy Things Church Leaders Say & Do, Domestic Violence, Domestic Violence and Churches, Failure to Report Crimes, It's All About the Image, Leaving the Church, Mandatory Reporting, Meetings with the Pastor, Mental Health and the Church, No-Talk Rule, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Bullies, Statute of Limitations

First #MeToo, Now #ChurchToo: Sexual Abuse, Harassment, and Mishandling in the Church

#MeToo, #ChurchToo, Sexual Abuse, Harassment, Church *** The hashtag #MeToo has been trending for quite some time on Twitter. Women who have been sexually harassed or abused have been identifying themselves as survivors of sexual harm, indicating it with the hashtag, #MeToo. But now, there is a new trending hashtag, #ChurchToo. The stories that you… Continue reading First #MeToo, Now #ChurchToo: Sexual Abuse, Harassment, and Mishandling in the Church

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Biblical Counseling, Guest Post, Master's University / Master's Seminary, Spiritual Bullies

Guest Post: If “Jane” from TMU were to seek “Biblical counseling” #DoYouSeeUs

Biblical Counseling, Nouthetic Counseling, "Jane" #DoYouSeeUs, John MacArthur, The Master's University   Rebecca Davis, who writes at Here's the Joy blog, has graciously allowed me to post her new article here. She has been a long-time friend of SSB. I really appreciate this article because in it, Rebecca describes the nouthetic, aka "Biblical counseling," process that… Continue reading Guest Post: If “Jane” from TMU were to seek “Biblical counseling” #DoYouSeeUs

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Emotional Responses, Leaving the Church, Personal Stories, Recovery Process, Spiritual Abuse, SPIRITUAL ABUSE RECOVERY, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies, Stories of Hope

Dr. Dan Allender: Trauma, Our Personal Stories, and Recovery through Music

Dr. Dan Allender, Trauma, Music, Spiritual Abuse Recovery, Personal Stories *** Those who have been reading here for a while know how important I believe it is for survivors to tell their abuse stories. It took a while for us to believe the lies our church leader(s) told us about who we are and who… Continue reading Dr. Dan Allender: Trauma, Our Personal Stories, and Recovery through Music

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Failure to Report Crimes, Forgiveness, Going Back to Church Again, LAWSUITS, Mandatory Reporting, Narcissistic Pastors, Personal Stories, Recovery Process, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Bullies

Kari Benton Shares: Spiritual Recovery after a Lawsuit and Spiritual Abuse

*** Some may recall the story of Titus and Kari Benton who were in a defamation lawsuit by their former pastor, Steve Wingfield, of First Christian Church of Florissant. The case was later dismissed, but when you are sued by your former employer and pastor, your long-term church home, and experience spiritual abuse, it takes… Continue reading Kari Benton Shares: Spiritual Recovery after a Lawsuit and Spiritual Abuse

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, BGBC Google Reviews, BGBC Lawsuit, BGBCSurvivors Imposter Blog, Chuck O'Neal, Church Discipline Process, Evangelism, Extra-Biblical Nonsense, It's All About the Image, Legalism, Meetings with the Pastor, Misuse of Scripture, Narcissistic Pastors, No-Talk Rule, Shunning, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies

Pastor Chuck O’Neal Continues to Pull the Wool over His Evangelist Friends’ Eyes

Chuck O'Neal, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, Jeff Rose, Dr. Edward Delcour, Mike Gendron, Mike Stockwell, and Robert Gray, Evangelism Reformation Conference, Reformation Fire Conference https://twitter.com/ChuckONeal_/status/883432785221894144 *** I don't have a problem with those tweets. On the surface, they are fine. But even false teachers get things right. The Bible tells us: For certain individuals whose… Continue reading Pastor Chuck O’Neal Continues to Pull the Wool over His Evangelist Friends’ Eyes

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Abuse Systems and Transformation Tools, Authoritative Preaching, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, Blog Series - Spiritual Abuse in the Church: A Guide to Recognition and Recovery, Chuck O'Neal, Church Bandwagon, CHURCH GOVERNANCE & POLICIES, Church Governance or Policy Issues, Crazy Things Church Leaders Say & Do, Doctrine as Idol, Extra-Biblical Nonsense, Julie Anne's Personal Stories, Leaving the Church, Legalism, Shunning, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies

Blog Series: Spiritual Abuse in the Church: A Guide to Recognition and Recovery by Pastor Ken Garrett, Wk 2

Spiritual Abuse, Pastor Ken Garrett, Spiritual Abuse in the church: A Guide to Recognition and Recovery *** Ok, here we go, plowing through Pastor Ken Garret's dissertation about spiritual abuse. I used the word plowing intentionally. For some of us, it will be work. It is not enjoyable to be reminded about difficult experiences. However,… Continue reading Blog Series: Spiritual Abuse in the Church: A Guide to Recognition and Recovery by Pastor Ken Garrett, Wk 2

Beaverton Grace Bible Church, BGBC Lawsuit, Chuck O'Neal, Clergy Sex Abuse, Crazy Things Church Leaders Say & Do, Doug Wilson, Extra-Biblical Nonsense, Full-Quiver, Homeschool Movement, IBLP and ATI, JULIE ANNE'S CASE, Media Interviews with Julie Anne, Patriarchal-Complementarian Movement, Personal Stories, Recovery Process, Spiritual Bullies, SPIRITUAL SOUNDING BOARD, Stories of Hope, SURVIVOR STORIES

Christian Blogger Invited to Speak at Free Thinkers’ Meeting about Abuse in Christian Churches

Free Thinker, Atheist, Christian Blogger, Thought Reform, Patriarchy, Spiritual Abuse, Cults Last Sunday, I had the privilege of speaking at a Free Thinkers group. Privilege, some might ask? You bet. I will take any opportunity afforded to share the truth, set the record straight, and especially let people know that I, as a Christian, am displeased by the… Continue reading Christian Blogger Invited to Speak at Free Thinkers’ Meeting about Abuse in Christian Churches

Calvinism, Compassion in Action, Crazy Things Church Leaders Say & Do, Grace Community Church, Misuse of Scripture, Personal Stories, Phil Johnson, Recovery Process, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Bullies, SURVIVOR STORIES, Troubling Tweets, Women and the Church

An Abuse Survivor’s Response to Pastor Phil Johnson’s Insensitive Tweet on Domestic Violence

Phil Johnson, Grace Community Church, Sex Abuse, Domestic Violence, Twitter *** Blog reader, Christina, left an important comment on yesterday's post regarding an insensitive and callous tweet Pastor Phil Johnson sent out regarding domestic violence. His tweet created quite an uproar on Twitter. Because Christina's comment is addressed to Phil Johnson, I didn't want it to get lost… Continue reading An Abuse Survivor’s Response to Pastor Phil Johnson’s Insensitive Tweet on Domestic Violence

Complementarianism, Extra-Biblical Nonsense, Gender Roles, Lori Alexander, SMH (Shake My Head), Spiritual Bullies, The Transformed Wife, Working Women

Trey Comments at “The Transformed Wife” About Working Women

Complementarianism, Gender Roles, The Transformed Wife -by Kathi In our last book post we talked about how God's Design turns work into a men's only club. This seems to be a big deal among the comp crowd. Trey posted a comment again at The Transformed Wife giving his two cents worth about why women shouldn't be… Continue reading Trey Comments at “The Transformed Wife” About Working Women

Christian Domestic Discipline, Domestic Violence, Patriarchal-Complementarian Movement, RC Sproul Jr., Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Bullies, Women and the Church

R.C. Sproul, Jr. Steps Down from Ligonier Ministries and Reformation Bible College

R.C. Sproul, Jr., Ligonier Ministries, Abuse, Reformation Bible College     Ligonier Ministries has reported that RC Sproul, Jr. is stepping down from Ligonier Ministries & Reformation Bible College citing personal reasons: December 12, 2016 Last Friday, the board of directors of Ligonier Ministries and Reformation Bible College received and affirmed the resignation of Dr.… Continue reading R.C. Sproul, Jr. Steps Down from Ligonier Ministries and Reformation Bible College

Authoritative Preaching, Emotional Responses, Leaving the Church, Personal Stories, Recovery Process, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Bullies, Stories of Hope

A Father Shares the Fallout His Family is Facing after Being in a High-Controlling Church

Spiritual abuse, children, mental health, high-controlling church, NAR, New Apostolic Reformation *** Special note:  I am in Chicago until 11/5 and would love to get together with survivors or those interested in helping survivors. If you would like to meet up, please contact me and let's see if we can arrange a gathering.  spiritualsb@gmail.com  … Continue reading A Father Shares the Fallout His Family is Facing after Being in a High-Controlling Church

Authoritative Preaching, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, C.J. Mahaney, Chuck O'Neal, Extra-Biblical Nonsense, Julie Anne's Personal Stories, Legalism, Misuse of Scripture, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies, Troubling Tweets

How our Pastor’s Biblical Interpretation Can Affect Our Understanding of Scripture and God

*** This is a very insightful statement from C.J. Mahaney.   https://twitter.com/CJMahaney/status/739414015546404864 When a pastor preaches,  he is leading his congregation in his interpretation of Scripture. It may or may not be correct. I know from reading many personal stories of those who were Mahaney's church that his teachings caused spiritual harm. I don't think… Continue reading How our Pastor’s Biblical Interpretation Can Affect Our Understanding of Scripture and God

Abuse Systems and Transformation Tools, Authoritative Preaching, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, Chuck O'Neal, Dictators, Doctrine as Idol, Doug Wilson, Grace Community Church, Harvest Bible Chapel, James MacDonald, John MacArthur, Julie Anne's Personal Stories, Leaving the Church, Legalism, Recovery Process, Shunning, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies

Help! My Family Member or Close Friend is Trapped in a High-Controlling Church or Cult. How Can I Encourage Them to Leave?

How to help a family member or friend leave a high-controlling church group or cult: spiritual abuse, trapped, thought reform, mind control, freedom   “Mind control is the process by which individual or collective freedom of choice and action is compromised by agents or agencies that modify or distort perception, motivation, affect, cognition and/or behavioral… Continue reading Help! My Family Member or Close Friend is Trapped in a High-Controlling Church or Cult. How Can I Encourage Them to Leave?

ABUSE RECOVERY PROCESS-PROBLEMS, Christian Love, Compassion in Action, Emotional Responses, Leaving the Church, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Bullies

The Gift of Standing in the Trenches with a Survivor

  https://youtu.be/UIt3dx4an9c   *** “Being heard is so close to being loved that for the average person, they are almost indistinguishable.” ― David Augsburger The other day, a spiritual abuse survivor and friend I met last year in Moscow, Idaho, posted the following quote by Dr. Diane Langberg on her Facebook wall. Please read it… Continue reading The Gift of Standing in the Trenches with a Survivor

Beaverton Grace Bible Church, Chuck O'Neal, Crazy Things Church Leaders Say & Do, Pro-Life Movement, Spiritual Bullies, Street Evangelism

Pastor Chuck O’Neal Badgers and Berates an Abortion Clinic Escort about His Manhood

Pastor Chuck O'Neal, Manhood, Street Evangelism, Abortion, Bully, Spiritual Abuse, Beaverton Grace Bible Church   Someone alerted me to the following video just yesterday. Last month, Pastor Chuck O'Neal of Beaverton Grace Bible Church went to the Lovejoy Surgicenter in Portland, Oregon. O'Neal and members from his church are frequent visitors outside the clinic "evangelizing."… Continue reading Pastor Chuck O’Neal Badgers and Berates an Abortion Clinic Escort about His Manhood

Clergy Sex Abuse, Divorce, It's All About the Image, Leaving the Church, Marriages Damaged-Destroyed by Sp. Ab., Narcissistic Pastors, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies, Tullian Tchividjian

Tullian Tchividjian and Coral Ridge Presbyterian Church Discussion: “He demanded that people be loyal to him.”

Pastor Tullian Tchividjian, Coral Ridge Presbyterian Church, Willow Creek, Liberate Network, Clergy Sex Abuse, Spiritual Abuse, Repentance, Grace     Hey friends (and welcome to new readers), I am going to do something a little bit different. I suspect many are chomping at the bit to discuss the situation regarding Tullian Tchividjian, so I am… Continue reading Tullian Tchividjian and Coral Ridge Presbyterian Church Discussion: “He demanded that people be loyal to him.”

Authoritative Preaching, Beaverton Grace Bible Church, BGBC Lawsuit, Chuck O'Neal, Doctrine as Idol, Gender Roles, Julie Anne's Personal Stories, Legalism, Parenting, Patriarchal-Complementarian Movement, Personal Stories, Recovery Process, Safe Churches, Spiritual Abuse, SPIRITUAL ABUSE RECOVERY, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies, SPIRITUAL SOUNDING BOARD, SURVIVOR STORIES

The Fallout of Spiritual Abuse on Our Children

Children Harmed by Spiritual Abuse   Yesterday, I was talking with my programming language tutor and mentioned that I had a blog. He asked what my blog was about and I told him the long story. He was absolutely dumbfounded by what he was hearing and kept shaking his head, not wanting to believe it, even… Continue reading The Fallout of Spiritual Abuse on Our Children

ABUSE & VIOLENCE IN THE CHURCH, Bill Gothard, Failure to Report Crimes, IBLP and ATI, LAWSUITS, Mental Health and the Church, Modesty and Purity Teachings, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Spiritual Abuse, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies, Women and the Church

While the Board of Bill Gothard’s Former Ministry, IBLP, Claims Judge Dismissed Lawsuit, Attorney for Plaintiffs Says Four New Plaintiffs Have Come Forward

Bill Gothard, Sexual Grooming, Lawsuit, IBLP Board, 4 New Plaintiffs, Lawsuit Not Dismissed   It's been a while since we've had an update on the lawsuit brought on by former volunteers/workers at Bill Gothard's former ministry who were allegedly sexually groomed by Bill Gothard. In November, Institute in Basic Life Principles (IBLP) published a statement regarding the lawsuit… Continue reading While the Board of Bill Gothard’s Former Ministry, IBLP, Claims Judge Dismissed Lawsuit, Attorney for Plaintiffs Says Four New Plaintiffs Have Come Forward

ABUSE RECOVERY PROCESS-PROBLEMS, Abuse Systems and Transformation Tools, Leaving the Church, Marriages Damaged-Destroyed by Sp. Ab., Recovery Process, Spiritual Abuse, SPIRITUAL ABUSE RECOVERY, Spiritual Authority, Spiritual Bullies

Four Primary Conditions that Result in People Leaving Abusive Churches and Cults

Spiritual Abuse: Leaving Abusive Cults and High-Controlling Churches   I have been very moved by many of your stories of abuse in the recent article, Spiritual Abuse: What Was the Last Straw That Caused You to Leave Your Abusive Church? Spiritual abuse is obviously not isolated. It's happening all over and crosses denominational lines. Several people have said… Continue reading Four Primary Conditions that Result in People Leaving Abusive Churches and Cults