*** My friend, Pastor Jeff Crippen, who blogs about domestic violence at A Cry for Justice posted the following note on the A Cry for Justice Facebook page and I asked pretty please if I could share it with you. Yes, I really did say, "pretty please." LOL Sadly, at Spiritual Sounding Board, we do often… Continue reading Why Don’t Young People go to Church?
Category: Leaving the Church
Is anyone celebrating the demise of Mark Driscoll and Mars Hill churches? Is it really over? Should current Mars Hill pastors be leading new churches?
*** Mars Hill Churches dissolving, becoming independent churches. Are people really celebrating? Should current Mars Hill pastors assume the role of pastors in the new independent churches? *** Yesterday, Mars Hill Pastor Dave Bruskas announced that the Mars Hill board decided that Marks Hill churches were dissolving: Today, I am excited to share… Continue reading Is anyone celebrating the demise of Mark Driscoll and Mars Hill churches? Is it really over? Should current Mars Hill pastors be leading new churches?
Doug Phillips Update, and Beall Phillips Publicly Responds to Michael Farris’ Recent Statement
Doug Phillips and family-integrated churches, his family's new church, and Beall Phillips' response to HSLDA's Michael Farris' statement Attention: All of you families who may have abandoned life-long friends and stopped going to traditional age-segregated churches, proclaiming them anti-Biblical because of the teachings by Doug Phillips and Vision Forum . . . . .… Continue reading Doug Phillips Update, and Beall Phillips Publicly Responds to Michael Farris’ Recent Statement
Spiritual Recovery and Leaving a High-Controlling Church: Free to Plant, Free to Bloom, Free to Be
*** What does freedom feel like for those who have left a high-controlling or spiritually abusive church? *** ** About a month ago, I was sent beautiful pictures by SSB's friend, BeenThereDoneThat (BTDT). At first I was drawn to them because cobalt blue is my favorite color. Cobalt blue exudes a soothing peace and tranquility for… Continue reading Spiritual Recovery and Leaving a High-Controlling Church: Free to Plant, Free to Bloom, Free to Be
Pastoral Confidentiality: Does it Still Apply after Church Member Resigns?
*** What is the responsibility of pastors for those they deem have "gone astray?" Do pastoral confidentiality rules apply even when someone resigns their church membership? *** *** The other day, I read an article, Stabbed in the Back by a Cult Leader and it left me feeling sad and angry. "Sheldon" is a… Continue reading Pastoral Confidentiality: Does it Still Apply after Church Member Resigns?
Spiritual Abuse: Interview with Doug Bursch
*** *** Yesterday I did an interview with Doug Bursch from Seattle's KGNW radio station. Doug describes himself in his bio as "a speaker, writer, pastor, teacher and evangelist." We spoke about spiritual abuse, healthy and unhealthy churches. I've done quite a few interviews since the lawsuit, but this one is my new favorite. If… Continue reading Spiritual Abuse: Interview with Doug Bursch
How do you warn someone about a dangerous spiritual group? What if that person is your spouse?
*** How do you warn someone about a dangerous or spiritually abusive leader or group? What if that someone is your spouse? *** Commenter, TIA, responded to my comment with a couple of key questions that were left unanswered. I think would be helpful to discuss these important questions, especially in light of the second… Continue reading How do you warn someone about a dangerous spiritual group? What if that person is your spouse?
When Sharing Concerns or Asking Pastors Questions Leads to Spiritual Abuse
* * * Questioning authority or raising concerns can be the litmus test to see if your pastor is spiritually abusive or not. * * * * * * Oh boy, is this a biggie. I was really moved when this topic come… Continue reading When Sharing Concerns or Asking Pastors Questions Leads to Spiritual Abuse
Spiritual Abuse: Harvest Bible Chapel – Should Church Members Stay or Leave?
* * * One big dilemma in spiritually abusive churches is deciding if and when to leave the church. Does God want people to leave a spiritually abusive church? Can God work through people left in an abusive church? Is there a Biblical precedent for this kind of situation? What… Continue reading Spiritual Abuse: Harvest Bible Chapel – Should Church Members Stay or Leave?
9Marks, Spiritual Abuse, and How Church Members Can Fall Through the Cracks
* * * Yesterday, I shared the a comment that I had posted on SharperIron.org forum. From my limited times there, I gather there are quite a few pastors. We were discussing 9Marks practices. Chip asked me to elaborate after reading my comment: I’ve read some of the 9Marks writings and some… Continue reading 9Marks, Spiritual Abuse, and How Church Members Can Fall Through the Cracks
Beaverton Grace Bible Church and Pastor Chuck O’Neal – A Year after They Lost the Defamation Lawsuit
* * * But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blpasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good, traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having a… Continue reading Beaverton Grace Bible Church and Pastor Chuck O’Neal – A Year after They Lost the Defamation Lawsuit
Should We Speak out about Our Spiritually Abusive Church?
* * * This comment came in on an earlier thread and there are so many answers. Because I spoke out against my former church, one of the most common questions in e-mails I get is: "should I speak out about our abuse to current members?" Here it is again:… Continue reading Should We Speak out about Our Spiritually Abusive Church?
Spiritual Abuse: Who is to Blame? The Pastor or the Congregant?
* * * Wicked shepherds have been around for a long, long time. This passage is from the Old Testament: The word of the Lord came to me: “Son of man, prophesy against the shepherds of Israel; prophesy, and say to them, even to the shepherds, Thus says the Lord God: Ah, shepherds of Israel who have… Continue reading Spiritual Abuse: Who is to Blame? The Pastor or the Congregant?
50 Ways to Leave Your (Spiritually Abusive) Pastor
* * * Gary from the Calvary Chapel Abuse blog wrote this poem to the tune of Paul Simon's Fifty Ways to Leave Your Lover and gave me permission to share it here. The YouTube is below so you can get the tune in your head while reading. The lyrics are… Continue reading 50 Ways to Leave Your (Spiritually Abusive) Pastor
Compassion with Shoes On
I read a beautiful article by Tony Roos on compassion this morning and saw this phrase which intrigued me: If you do a search on the compassion of Christ you see each time that word is used for him it is coupled with an action that he gives to alleviate the suffering the he encounters.… Continue reading Compassion with Shoes On
Family Members from Westboro Baptist Escape to New Freedom
* * * Yesterday morning I tweeted about the following story and I've had a number of readers send it to me as well. It's a story of amazing courage and also sadness. Imagine escaping the only life you have ever known - and this means leaving… Continue reading Family Members from Westboro Baptist Escape to New Freedom
Spiritual Abuse Recovery: Caleigh’s Story, “Cross Obsession”
This is Spiritual Abuse Awareness month and I wanted to share a story by Caleigh, a friend and blogger at The Profligate Truth who attended a church from CJ Mahaney's family of churches, Sovereign Grace Ministries (SGM). Her church was Covenant Life Church (CLC) in Maryland which recently voted to sever ties with SGM amidst a current… Continue reading Spiritual Abuse Recovery: Caleigh’s Story, “Cross Obsession”
When You Don’t Want to "Go" to Church
Yes, this is the church and the people in divorce court.So many people are leaving the church. Why? Because they are experiencing emotional abuse, psychological abuse, spiritual abuse, and intellectual abuse. And neglect. More and more people are becoming post church people. David Hayward of nakedpastor.comFor some reason, this week I've heard from a number… Continue reading When You Don’t Want to "Go" to Church
Spiritual Abuse: Friends Left Behind and Moving Forward
There were people who warned me that my former church was not a healthy place. They were concerned by what they heard when they listened to recorded sermons. They were alarmed when they visited the church. One friend had gone to a high school graduation ceremony for a few homeschool graduates. The pastor spoke and… Continue reading Spiritual Abuse: Friends Left Behind and Moving Forward
Hannah’s Personal Story in Her Own Words
Readers: I've had this post in my "draft posts" for quite some time, but the time to post it is now and I will explain more about that very soon. You'll see why it is important to hear from her own words. I shared my perspective of Hannah's story in the most popular blog post,… Continue reading Hannah’s Personal Story in Her Own Words
Spiritual Sounding Board 