* * * One big dilemma in spiritually abusive churches is deciding if and when to leave the church. Does God want people to leave a spiritually abusive church? Can God work through people left in an abusive church? Is there a Biblical precedent for this kind of situation? What… Continue reading Spiritual Abuse: Harvest Bible Chapel – Should Church Members Stay or Leave?
Category: ABUSE RECOVERY PROCESS-PROBLEMS
Biblical Counseling: Is it Always Safe? – And Pastoral Response to Abuse Survivor
* * * “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. Matt. 5:3-4 Today I stumbled across a disturbing article at One Lost Child blog. Blogger Cathy raises concerns regarding the care women will receive at… Continue reading Biblical Counseling: Is it Always Safe? – And Pastoral Response to Abuse Survivor
Announcement: New Spiritual Sounding Board Forum
* * * Announcing New Private Spiritual Abuse Forum Blogging is great for introducing a variety of topics, but sometimes it's awkward to break the conversation to share a personal need or concern. Over the past year, there have been times when I have wished there was a private place to… Continue reading Announcement: New Spiritual Sounding Board Forum
BeenThereDoneThat and Flying Free: Spiritual Abuse, A Personal Story
* * * This story is a special one to me. Regular reader, "BeenThereDoneThat" (BTDT) has been commenting on this blog since the first weeks here. During that time, I have watched her in her commenting as she has been recovering through a very difficult spiritually abusive church experience. I had… Continue reading BeenThereDoneThat and Flying Free: Spiritual Abuse, A Personal Story
9Marks, Spiritual Abuse, and How Church Members Can Fall Through the Cracks
* * * Yesterday, I shared the a comment that I had posted on SharperIron.org forum. From my limited times there, I gather there are quite a few pastors. We were discussing 9Marks practices. Chip asked me to elaborate after reading my comment: I’ve read some of the 9Marks writings and some… Continue reading 9Marks, Spiritual Abuse, and How Church Members Can Fall Through the Cracks
Beaverton Grace Bible Church and Pastor Chuck O’Neal – A Year after They Lost the Defamation Lawsuit
* * * But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blpasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good, traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having a… Continue reading Beaverton Grace Bible Church and Pastor Chuck O’Neal – A Year after They Lost the Defamation Lawsuit
Should We Speak out about Our Spiritually Abusive Church?
* * * This comment came in on an earlier thread and there are so many answers. Because I spoke out against my former church, one of the most common questions in e-mails I get is: "should I speak out about our abuse to current members?" Here it is again:… Continue reading Should We Speak out about Our Spiritually Abusive Church?
Spiritual Abuse: Who is to Blame? The Pastor or the Congregant?
* * * Wicked shepherds have been around for a long, long time. This passage is from the Old Testament: The word of the Lord came to me: “Son of man, prophesy against the shepherds of Israel; prophesy, and say to them, even to the shepherds, Thus says the Lord God: Ah, shepherds of Israel who have… Continue reading Spiritual Abuse: Who is to Blame? The Pastor or the Congregant?
Church Abuse, Spiritual Triage, and Victim’s Advocacy Ministries
* * * You may have noticed a brief blog break. Thursday I went out of town to a meeting and Friday I drove back home and later had a 3-hour interview regarding the bad side of Christian homeschooling and so I was tied up a bit. I'd like to share… Continue reading Church Abuse, Spiritual Triage, and Victim’s Advocacy Ministries
The Legal “Perfect Storm” for Enabling Sex Abuse
* * * First things first - I have seen several news reports wrongly report that Judge Burrell recently dismissed the Sovereign Grace Ministries (SGM) lawsuit. That is not true. I contacted Attorney Susan Burke to make sure I was understanding it correctly and asked if she could send me a… Continue reading The Legal “Perfect Storm” for Enabling Sex Abuse
50 Ways to Leave Your (Spiritually Abusive) Pastor
* * * Gary from the Calvary Chapel Abuse blog wrote this poem to the tune of Paul Simon's Fifty Ways to Leave Your Lover and gave me permission to share it here. The YouTube is below so you can get the tune in your head while reading. The lyrics are… Continue reading 50 Ways to Leave Your (Spiritually Abusive) Pastor
Spiritual Abuse: Faith Healing and Parallels
* * * By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another. John 13:35 This next story is sad. It reminded me of the many deaths attributed to "faith healing" at the Followers of Christ church near my former town in Oregon. … Continue reading Spiritual Abuse: Faith Healing and Parallels
Compassion with Shoes On
I read a beautiful article by Tony Roos on compassion this morning and saw this phrase which intrigued me: If you do a search on the compassion of Christ you see each time that word is used for him it is coupled with an action that he gives to alleviate the suffering the he encounters.… Continue reading Compassion with Shoes On
We Need Safe Places, Or, Overturning Tables
* * * Many of you know of my partnership with Homeschoolers Anonymous. In this blog, survivors have told their sometimes sad and disturbing stories of what it was like growing up as a homeschooled student. Here is how I connected with them. There is a subculture within the bigger umbrella… Continue reading We Need Safe Places, Or, Overturning Tables
Black and White Teachings from the Pulpit: Helpful or Not?
* * * "Mental illness" is a poor term, sounding like "It's just your mind." But a broken brain is as physical as a broken bone. Rick Warren tweeted 4/13/13 a week after his son committed suicide. I still have a couple of more thoughts regarding the Nally suicide case… Continue reading Black and White Teachings from the Pulpit: Helpful or Not?
How do Churches Handle Difficult Mental Health Cases, Biblical Counseling, and the Law?
* * * A friend sent me a tragic story this morning. It is an older story from 1979 involving John MacArthur's church, Grace Community Church, and a young man, Kenneth Nally, who at the age of 24 shot himself and died. He suffered from depression and sought counsel… Continue reading How do Churches Handle Difficult Mental Health Cases, Biblical Counseling, and the Law?
Biblical Counseling and Mental Health Crises: Does it Always Work?
* * * I have been seeing a lot of response online regarding the death of Matthew Warren last week. As you are probably aware, Matthew, age 27, was the youngest son of Pastor Rick Warren, and last Friday after many years of depression and despair, he ended his own life.… Continue reading Biblical Counseling and Mental Health Crises: Does it Always Work?
BGBC Defamation Lawsuit Archive: How to Document Spiritual Abuse in Your Church
Every account like this makes a difference for those of us who've survived spiritually abusive situations. And hopefully, in the long run, courageous people like yourself and others who choose to do something will help turn the tide. ~Brad Sargent Stroll back with me to one year ago. A year ago, my life was… Continue reading BGBC Defamation Lawsuit Archive: How to Document Spiritual Abuse in Your Church
Should We Repent for Allowing Ourselves to be Spiritually Abused?
This picture was taken in my neighborhood a while back. I took it from the driver's seat of my car. That is one big honkin' tumbleweed and it always amazes me how tumbleweed can roll through fields, across a busy street and end up in our neighborhood. I had this picture in my mind when… Continue reading Should We Repent for Allowing Ourselves to be Spiritually Abused?
Family Members from Westboro Baptist Escape to New Freedom
* * * Yesterday morning I tweeted about the following story and I've had a number of readers send it to me as well. It's a story of amazing courage and also sadness. Imagine escaping the only life you have ever known - and this means leaving… Continue reading Family Members from Westboro Baptist Escape to New Freedom
Spiritual Sounding Board 