The Power of a Transformed Wife, Lori Alexander, Mentoring, Titus 2
This is a book review series of The Power of a Transformed Wife by Lori Alexander. If you are just joining us, you may click on previous chapter reviews to catch up.
When my husband asked me what I have been writing about I answered, “I’m learning how to become the wife you always wanted me to be.” He rolled his eyes and went back to drying the dishes.
Chapter Two – Why I Mentor Women
Lori states that she has been mentoring women for over ten years. She has mentored women who have dealt with the following issues:
I have mentored women whose husbands were having affairs, drinking way too much, deeply addicted to pornography, lazy and not working, never home due to work, not interested in God, or were absent fathers to their children.
Do you see what I see in this list? All of these issues deal with a husband’s actions. Now, I understand that a wife may seek advice on what to do or how to handle these types of situations with her husband, but, shouldn’t it be the husband who is mentored? If my husband is drinking way too much, that is not my fault. I would not expect someone to mentor me on how to be a better wife to help him not drink more. I would expect someone to mentor him on how to deal with his alcohol addiction.
But, no, Lori finds her life calling in Titus 2: 3-5:
The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; that they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. (KJV)
Lori offers a “state of women” today indicating that the majority of women have never been taught the principles of Titus 2: 3-5. They grew up with parents that portrayed poor marriages or were divorced. (Wait a minute! Lori stated in Chapter One that her parents did not have a happy marriage and she and Ken started off in a bad marriage. How are they any different than women today?)
She says women are encouraged to go to college, take out loans, and get a career. Then, they’re encouraged to live life before being tied down to a husband and children. When they have all the children they care to have, they’re encouraged to have surgery to not have any more so they can afford a fancy kitchen.
Ummmm, Lori, where are all of your studies on your “state of women” to support your words? No where? How convenient. This is typical Lori talk – make blanket statements about women today and show no evidence to support your argument. By the way, I’ve had all the children I care to have and I’m still waiting for that fancy kitchen.
Without using the word, Lori believes in complementary gender roles between husband and wife as well as the role of women in the church. She laments that some couples dare to share tasks in caring for the home. GASP! Not that! And, of course, feminism does not work because women will never be the same as men. Yet she argues that God loves men and women equally. Does that mean God is a feminist?
Lori’s experience is that when she counsels women to become submissive keepers of the home, they are suddenly joyful and can’t believe the lies of feminism that they fell for. Lori also states that she has personally witnessed women lead their husband to the Lord when they change their attitudes to a gentle and quiet spirit. Did Lori question the salvation of the husband like she did of her high school boyfriends?
Lori starts to close out this chapter with a quote by John MacArthur. Lori does not cite her quote, which is not a surprise. Lori is a college-educated teacher and she does not cite quotes in her book or on her blog. That really is mind-boggling to me. In essence, the quote talks about how it is best for women to accept what her husband’s salary provides in order to stay home and raise her children.
The final ending of this chapter is a quote from one of Lori’s blog posts which offers quotes by sisters, Anna Sofia and Elizabeth Botkins. She then wonders why women work outside the home and are continually exhausted when there is so much to do at home. It must be exhausting to worry about women who are exhausted.
My final take on this chapter is that I don’t find it quite as obvious as Lori does that women need mentoring in regard to their role in life. Forgive me if I say this often during this series: it is not always possible for women to stay home with their children in the United States. It certainly is not necessarily a norm for women around the world either. Also, Lori could have picked a better example than the Botkins sisters who are in their 30s, not married, and are still living at home where their expenses are paid for by their parents.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.