Christian Marriage, Complementarianism, Marriage Advice, Rick Thomas
There are things in life we rate. Customer service ratings help companies know how to improve their services. If you want to see a movie, you may visit Rotten Tomatoes to read the ratings. When you see a doctor, you might be asked to rate your pain.
Rick Thomas wants husbands to rate their wives. That’s right, husbands should give their wives a 1-10 rating based upon:
Give your wife a numerical rating from 1 to 10, with one being “a lot of work ahead” and ten being “the husband is on the job and getting things done.”
Her passion for Christ has increased – she is more transparent today than when you first married her.
She regularly confesses her sin to you – she is quick to seek forgiveness for her sins.
Her theological grasp of the Bible has increased – her desire to share the gospel with others continues to grow.
She is less fearful, anxious, and insecure – she worries less and has fewer doubts and regrets.
She is more content in Christ – she is at peace with where God has her.
She quickly processes disappointment through the lens of God’s sovereignty – she is more kind, loving, and gracious to others.
She is eager to share with you what God is doing in her life – she is eager to share with you and others where she is messing up.
She is eager to seek out your care and advice – she is eager to support you in your endeavors.
She loves people and bibically cares for them – she is not critical and cynical, but faithful and hopeful.
Now, I guess one could argue that this isn’t so bad because in the end, this article is really about the husband and whether or not he is fulfilling his “husbandry” duties assigned by God. But, a husband rating his wife to see if he’s doing a good job?! That seems flat out weird. This is a relationship we are talking about, not a transaction.
Let’s also talk about how completely arbitrary and subjective these ratings may be. A husband may give a low score on an area where others may rate her higher. How would the wife feel if her husband rated her poorly in multiple areas? Can you imagine how demoralizing this could be and may cause further harm in the relationship?
Here’s what Thomas leaves out…The wife should be able to rate her husband according to the same scale for the same reasons. That way the husband would receive an accurate rating and know where he needs to improve!
Husbands, these things on your list to rate aren’t your responsibility anyway. So, why not save yourself some stress in trying to figure out if your husbandry is moving in the right direction and simply do what Jesus said: Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and mind and love your neighbor as yourself.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.