Christian Industrial Complex, Clergy Sex Abuse, It's All About the Image, Marriages Damaged-Destroyed by Sp. Ab., Mental Health and the Church, Sexual Abuse/Assault and Churches, Spiritual Abuse, Tullian Tchividjian

1. Third Woman Victim of Tullian Tchividjian’s Seduction Gives Details; She Reportedly Extends Timeline of His Adulteries Back into 2013

Introduction to Four-Part Series:

Tullian Tchividjian Situation Update

We (Julie Anne and Brad) were planning a two-part series to update the situation on Tullian Tchividjian, focusing on what has been happening with his current and former publishers, and individuals who’d been promoting him over the years.  However, we are now able to share related breaking news — a third woman with whom I (Julie Anne) have been in touch gave us permission to share certain details of her story. She was reportedly drawn into a sexual relationship by Tullian Tchividjian, with a very similar pattern as other women have stated he used for grooming them emotionally. Tchividjian lured them in to trust him and doubt themselves, and then in two other cases at least, eventually seduced them into sexual involvement.

This newly revealed woman says that her connection with Mr. Tchividjian started in October 2013 and ended in August 2016 before he got remarried. Her additional account changes things — her narrative extends Mr. Tchividjian’s apparent manipulative patterns back into 2013. It also means he has kept silent about this relationship for over three years, which fits the general pattern he has displayed with two other women, of not admitting to adultery until it has been exposed publicly.

And so, this has led us to reconfigure the material we had into a series of four posts:

1. A basic timeline from this survivor, sharing key details of her experience. This post from Julie Anne also shares her analysis on why this woman’s story is credible, and some related context to give a larger perspective to what this new information means for Mr. Tchividjian and those who’ve supported him. [Link: Part #1.]

2. A timeline infographic for 2014 through 2016 that shows the overlap among women Mr. Tchividjian was reportedly carrying on with, along with books he got published and periodic bestseller status. (This infographic was produced over a week ago. We expect to update it soon to reflect the new information about this woman from 2013.) This visual is important because, in just the past two weeks, two groups have called Mr. Tchividjian to step aside from all public ministry based on his character and patterns of behavior. Also, a number of his former promoters and protectors have gone on record, removing their support — some taking additional actions. [Link: Part #2.]

3. A general information research post on the three publishers of books by Tullian Tchividjian: Crossway, David C Cook, and Multnomah. This post from Brad (futuristguy) includes a timeline of his books from all three publishers, notes on what is/is not still available, and any changes on the part of publishers in their catalogs or websites apparently in response to revelations about him since summer 2015. This information helps explain the publication half of the infographic. [Link: Part #3.]

4. A post focusing on David C Cook. This post from Julie Anne is more specifically on conflicting news reports and information from direct contacts about whether David C Cook actually has a contract with Tullian Tchividjian to publish his next book. It also includes an open appeal for this non-profit publisher to clarify their stance publicly. This challenge seems especially timely, in light of this breaking news about a third victim that Mr. Tchividjian reportedly began pursuing the very same month that David C Cook published what turned out to be his bestselling book, One Way Love: Inexhaustible Grace for an Exhausted World. It also includes what the women survivors of Mr. Tchividjian’s grooming/seduction want the Board of Trustees of David C Cook to know, and their suggestions for how to make things right. [Link: Part #4.]

Our hope is that if more situations like this get exposed to the light, the less frequently they’ll happen in the future. And, as is our practice, we make every effort to protect those who are survivors of abuse, and give them a platform to share so their voice can be heard.

*     *     *     *     *     *     *

Part #1 of 4, by Julie Anne Smith

“New Woman” Reveals Timeline

of Her Relationship with Tullian Tchividjian

Late September, I received an e-mail from a woman claiming that she, too, had been groomed and eventually had a sexual relationship with Tullian Tchividjian. It was quite easy to verify the legitimacy of this woman’s account, as she sent me a timeline with names, locations, dates, and other very specific details that only those who had an intimate relationship with Tullian Tchividjian would know. She described the grooming process which completely matched the other women’s accounts.

Here is a brief and general timeline she sent me:

October 2013 – He reached out to me on Twitter.

October 2013 through February 2014 – Constant emails and texting – sending songs and his books.

February 2014 – Visited with him.

March 2014 – He told me on the phone that he “could marry me today without ever needing to know another thing about me.”

May 2014 – I spent a special occasion with him.

November 2014 – Was the last time I saw him in person.

January 2015 – I told him he needed to go back to [his wife] Kim for good and allow her to be his “pastor and best friend.”

February – March 2015 – I received sporadic texts and phone calls – and I was hopeful a little.

April 2015 – He called me when he returned from NYC to learn of Kim’s affair.

April through the end of May 2015 – He called me almost every day – talking about how he needed a plan – needed to get divorced but only if he knew he could find a woman to marry right away.

July 2015 – He stopped calling and texting.

February 2016 – He called for the first time since July.  I told him I despised him and never to call me again.

March 2016 – He called to tell me “they” had found out about another woman.  But, it wasn’t me so don’t worry.

August 2016 – The last call I accepted because the number was blocked.  He called to tell me he wanted my advice on how to reconcile with Kim. That’s the time he said, “I don’t know if I ever loved you, but I do know that I used you.”

Take special note of this: She contacted me nearly two months before “Lisa” and “Kara” shared their stories on Nate Sparks’ blog (November 21/”Lisa” and November 23/”Kara”). I did not even know of these two women’s existence until they went public and their experiences with Tullian Tchividjian were published. And yet, this new woman who contacted me over two months before detailed pretty much what has turned out to be the same profile of emotional and sexual grooming that Lisa and Kara details — plus the sexual seduction and continued emotional stringing along that Rachel and one other woman had already shared with me. They were, in the terms of the Partial Timeline post on SSB, Woman #1 from 2014, and Woman #2/Rachel from 2015, whose story was told from November 29-December 7. So, this new woman from 2013 couldn’t have copied the pattern from public information, because that information wasn’t even public yet.

So, have you been counting the women? Now we are up to 7 women whom Tullian pursued for sexual purposes (4 of which resulted in a physical relationship, including 1 new wife).

  • Woman #1 who was actually revealed after Rachel, even though in this current timeline, she was first (2014). This was the relationship that Tullian Tchividjian’s family friend/mentor Steve Brown plus two elders knew about in 2014 and yet failed to disclose to Coral Ridge Presbyterian Church.
  • Rachel (real first name) from 2015: Her story is told in a series of posts starting with this link.
  • The three women who were reportedly groomed sexually, which Nate Sparks reported on his blog.
  • This newly revealed woman, who pushes the grooming and clergy sexual abuse farther back now to 2013.
  • Stacie – Tullian’s new wife – that he reportedly was relating with more intensively starting in the summer of 2015 and married August 26, 2016.

Did you notice that Tullian kept this woman from 2013 strung along sexually and emotionally for nearly three years!! Also, it wouldn’t be apparent until you start lining up some of these dates with others in the timeline, but October 2013, when Tullian reached out to this woman on Twitter, was the same month that his eventual bestseller with David C. Cook was published: One Way Love: Inexhaustible Grace for an Exhausted World.

Our next post shows an infographic on what Tullian Tchividjian’s pursuit of these women looks like, when it is layered over some of his ministry platform and publication data.

*     *     *     *     *     *     *

21 thoughts on “1. Third Woman Victim of Tullian Tchividjian’s Seduction Gives Details; She Reportedly Extends Timeline of His Adulteries Back into 2013”

  1. needed to get divorced but only if he knew he could find a woman to marry right away.

    This part is so strange to me but it is totally consistent with what happened in real life.

    I am reading these background Tullian things and relating quite a bit. I did not have any kind of relationship with a pastor, but I am definitely recognizing a few things from a previously relationship and wondering about others. Thank you for continuing to share these stories.


  2. This whole thing just keeps getting more incredible (and more disgusting).

    When I told my dad that the list of women has grown to seven, he had the following (sarcastic!) response: “And they were /all/ Kim’s fault, right?”


  3. New Woman–I am so sorry that for three years you have suffered the confusion and humiliation of being “chosen” by that manipulative and egotistical man. I pray that you will experience deep healing from this betrayal of your trust. Thank you for your courage in speaking out your truth. Know that you are loved and accepted by many people who recognize the seriousness of the sins committed against you. May you experience what real grace is all about!!


  4. Nancyjane, thank you for your kind words to New Woman. I’ll make sure she sees them. She is so brave and her heart is in the right place. She doesn’t want anyone else to be harmed.


  5. I have no more words, but I second Julia Anne and nancyjane, and I applaud the New Woman. This pseudo-Christian Tullian is the “Tiger Woods” of his profession, whatever it is called, but true Christianity it is NOT.
    Once again, Julie Anne, thank you for you and your crack team’s important work. It’s paying off big time.


  6. needed to get divorced but only if he knew he could find a woman to marry right away. ”
    Yes, Lea, I’m surprised that he admits to it. Remarriage after divorce is enough of a touchy subject for Christians. Furthermore, we’ve had a number of comments here made by singles/single-agains about feeling unwelcome in the church for that reason.
    So high school; being Canadian I remember Degrassi in the ’80s, and one girl asking her friend, “so, you only break up if you’ve got a back-up?” And a pastor too! I grieve for couples that he married.


  7. So he called this woman asking for advice on how to reconnect with Kim the very same month he married Stacie?

    Stacie…if you are reading this…please, PLEASE get out. Don’t allow his opportunity to hurt you continue.


  8. Because of his position of authority, Tullian’s behavior was abusive. Even if he’d been an ordinary guy who picked up women in bars and gyms his behavior would make him one smooth operator for decent women to avoid.

    From basic math I figured he married Kim when he was 20 or 21. Let’s hear it for early marriage to keep everyone chaste! 😛

    Liked by 1 person

  9. If Tullian had sexual contact in any of the 13 states and D.C. in which it is illegal for a clergy member to have sexual contact with those under their counsel and/or spiritual care, the women could ask that criminal charges be brought.

    Thanks to social media, clergy sexual abuse survivors in other states are learning of those laws, and asking their Legislators to introduce bills in their respective states. The Minnesota la has been on the books for 32 years and has helped reduce the number of cases over the years. We were told that some perpetrators have left Minnesota to go to other states in which it is not illegal.

    May some day it be illegal in all states, so that everyone is protected, and when it does occur, they have the right to bring charges!

    Liked by 1 person

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