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Kathi here. We’ve had a lot to digest this week. Perhaps it’s time for a bit of humor. John Piper tends to send out some bizarre tweets which may leave you scratching your head. Why not turn them into the inspirational quote that they were obviously intended to be? These are real tweets from John Piper. Word for word, letter by letter.
I left out the one about radical wartime lifestyles in the retirement years. Quite frankly, I find nothing inspirational about old people partaking in warfare.
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Edited to add (at Shy1’s request): This is a title of an article John Piper wrote for Desiring God. It is best read with a middle school mindset. A glass of wine or two doesn’t hurt either!
Thank you for the inspiration, CREC Memes! ~Kathi
Oh my word, Kathi. You obviously had too much time on your hands! hahaha These are great!!!
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Huh????
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😂 WUT A NUT. Talk about being an author of confusion.
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Haha! I had fun. I’m easily amused.
Although, I could have made one from his latest article about spiritual pleasure vs. sexual pleasure.
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The “linger here with me for a moment” kills me!
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Someone needs to explain to me why Casino’s win in the end? Is he trying to be cute? My husband & I love swimming in our indoor pool, dude needs to lighten up.
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I literally laughed out loud at the Casino one! Coworker was disturbed. Somebody needs to explain to John Piper the real reason the house always wins…
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Ha ha! I love these. How about the one about how sex is boring to children? And then there’s the one about lover’s lane…
Although, I could have made one from his latest article about spiritual pleasure vs. sexual pleasure.
Please do!
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I don’t understand what we’re supposed to know about Chris.
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Shy1 – Your wish is my command! 🙂
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Wasn’t there a sitcom about Chris a while back?
Did JP actually tweet about sex being boring to children? He knows no boundaries at all. That is a slap in the face for those of us who have been sexually abused, but with JP I’m not at all surprised. “Oh, ho-hum, I’m being assaulted again!!”
Ok, I am back to the lighter side now. He is completely ridiculous.
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If you’ve been indoctrinated into those circles (fundagelicalism with a reformed spin), Piper’s tweets make perfect sense.
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What a strange bird. All of Mr. Piper’s comments are pretty bizarre, but the one about the hammer really has me dumbfounded.
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Muff, I was thinking the same thing. With the exception of the casino one…so, God is heavily invested in making sure the casinos win? That’s the only way that quote makes sense.
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Piper has a very “ghetto” mentality. (look up the word ghetto if you think it only pertains to urban inner city). His world has become so small that he assumes most people must understand (and should agree with) his point of view. He reminds me of my son as a four year old. At that age, he assumed others lived like him, knew his parents, and experienced the same world he inhabited. He had to be exposed to other cultures, children, families etc. as well as mature in order to understand not everyone thinks like him or even understands him.
Piper’s “shorthand” comes across as very simplistic and confusing. He assumes his thoughts need no explaination. Unfortunately, “believers” with such narrow mind sets do not compel the “seeker” to consider Christ. Piper speaks a language that the world at large does not understand. We are called to be light and salt for the world. I don’t believe Piper’s words add any flavor or insight into God’s great love of his creation.
Thank you, Kathi for finding these memes. I have to admit they are funny! A great weekend to all!
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Re Mr. Piper’s comment on casinos: some will take it to mean that if God is deciding who wins, he must really love casinos since he lets them win more than the gamblers do; others will read his words and think they should gamble like a house afire because God always provides for his people and he’ll use gambling to do that for them.
As far as I’m concerned, most casino ads I see are quite honest regarding their plans for your money: Casino Promises a 95% payback – and it’s not a scam!
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These comments are all great. Let’s linger with them for a while.
Snarky snark!
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I tried my hand at making one of these and Tweeted it.
You can view my attempt at sounding like an inspirational John Piper here (I totally made up the text content of the tweet. I was trying to sound like Piper but don’t know if I succeeded):
_John Piper Parody Tweet_
It is my “Vaguely Religious and Random John Piper” parody persona
#VRRJohnPiper
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Kathi–Lingering!! lol
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Miss Daisy, You win the Cupie Doll!! I laughed so hard tears are rolling down my face.
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Let’s see… How about, “If grace is an ocean, we all eat the fruit.”
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Thank you, Brenda R.
Coming up with one of those is harder than it looks.
John Piper Tweets are like a Christianized version of a Chinese Fortune Cookie.
(Which I may mention on another Piper parody Tweet image, if I ever make another one.)
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Daisy, It could be dangerous trying to think somewhat like JP, even in a parody.
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He is so religious that he makes no sense to us the unreligious. Or should that be the irreligious.
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“I don’t understand what we’re supposed to know about Chris.”
LOL! I was not sure whose typo that was so I didn’t want to say anything. But I suppose we’re supposed to “ponder that”.
Lol!!!!
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“His world has become so small that he assumes most people must understand (and should agree with) his point of view”
This is spot on. Even as he has traveled around the world speaking and making retirement videos in Geneva, he stays in his safe little bubble where there is mutual admiration 24/7.
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Thanks, Kathi! Perfect, ha ha!
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Besides being goofy, the hammer one is creepy. Is he saying to go around smashing things in God’s name?
Bill Gothard used to teach that the husband/father is “God’s Hammer” while the wife/mother is the “chisel” and the children are “diamonds in the rough” that need to be beaten for their own good — or something like that. Perhaps this what JP is referring to?
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Don’t ever forget that Piper was raised in Bob jones culture. His traveling evangelist father eventually went to an SBC church after a disagreement with Jones. Piper was weaned on doctrinal authoritarianism.
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Wary Witness – It brings a new meaning to the song, “If I had a hammer….I’d hammer in the morning….I’d hammer in the evening….All over this land….”
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Hahaha. And I’d rather be a hammer than a nail!
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By the way, a backyard swimming pool sounds like a terrific place for a happily married couple to hang out together.
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Anyone else reminded of Jack Handey’s “Deep Thoughts”, as featured on Saturday Night Live? Piper’s tweets could compete with those for pure head-scratching weirdness.
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“Anyone else reminded of Jack Handey’s “Deep Thoughts”, as featured on Saturday Night Live? Piper’s tweets could compete with those for pure head-scratching weirdness.”
Yes!!! Exactly!
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“The land that had nourished him and had borne him fruit now turned against him and called him a fruit. Man, I hate land like that.”
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“If you’ve been indoctrinated into those circles (fundagelicalism with a reformed spin), Piper’s tweets make perfect sense.”
Yes Muff. And one reason conversing with them is an exercise in futility. A head banging necessity.
I know so many young men who view him as deeply spiritual, brilliant and passionate about this roulette wheel controlling God.
If I believed in end times propaganda, I would put the YRR mess in that category! Where can I put it? What category does such an unthinking mass delusion go into? Have you seen the amount of followers he has? Is it Evangelical Arrested development, perhaps? Please?
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I love the one about casinos. I have no idea what the f*** he thinks he’s trying to say, I just love the pseudo-profound glue-sniffing confusion of it.
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John Piper: the gift that keeps on giving.
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BWA!! That’s great.
The Babylon bee made a light joke about piper punching himself the other day and fanboys went crazy in the comments all ‘that’s too far’.
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Dash, I don’t think John Piper quite gets how casino’s make money. That’s what I thought when I read that.
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Lea, I read it thinking that if God is sovereign over random acts, then why wouldn’t someone gamble? If the casino can benefit off of God’s control, then so can the gambler. Then the gambler, having been a benefactor of God’s sovereign reign, can declare that he/she is #blessed!
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Brenda R, you have taken the curse of man one step farther! LOL!
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Anyone thought of doing a series of memes like these with the background from “Deep Thoughts”? Or a series of short blip-vert videos with “Deep Thoughts” intro and b/g but with Piper tweet quotes?
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Lea and Kathi: I cannot take credit for, “The land that had nourished him and had borne him fruit now turned against him and called him a fruit. Man, I hate land like that.”
That was one of Jack Handy’s that came to mind when he was being discussed. Sorry, I should have given him credit at the time.
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“Bill Gothard used to teach that the husband/father is “God’s Hammer” while the wife/mother is the “chisel” and the children are “diamonds in the rough” that need to be beaten for their own good — or something like that.”
………………………………………………………………………………………………
If you just take a hammer and chisel to a diamond, you’ll create nothing but destruction. If Gothard really did use that metaphor, how perfectly and unintentionally apt, almost prophetic, like the words of Caiaphas about Christ.
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“I just love the pseudo-profound glue-sniffing confusion of it.”
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It is what happens when one who isn’t clever enough to realize they’re not clever gets an undeserved platform, much like Kanye West.
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“Lea, I read it thinking that if God is sovereign over random acts, then why wouldn’t someone gamble? If the casino can benefit off of God’s control, then so can the gambler. Then the gambler, having been a benefactor of God’s sovereign reign, can declare that he/she is #blessed!”
I doubt he thought it through. Piper has made his bones on being a shock jock. Anyone remember the “scream of the Damned”? Christian hedonism? There are plenty out there from him.
The key to understanding Piper is that young minds full of mush are attracted to what they see as his passionate spirituality. He is bold and declarative while practically weeping every time he speaks. He will use loud and then Whispers with constant hand gestures. It is more about being mesmerised.
His groupues are not exactly a thinking movement. Have you ever tried to read any of Piper’s long books? It is like Alice in Wonderland on steroids.
In Piper’s world a bee sting has a message from God in it. It is exhausting and mind numbing.
And Piper fans can refrain from telling me I just don’t understand him. I go back quite a ways with Piper.
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I’ve heard this is a result of Nietzsche. For Nietzsche, only those who are above the rabble can truly understand and comment. That’s why there are all these movies where there’s one person who sees this problem or solution and everyone else is oblivious until the hero(ine) swoops in to save the day.
So, people are somewhat conditioned to accept that the elite operate on some sort of higher plane, and that their best response is to financially support and obey. There’s a pretty good interview with the CEO of Whole Foods that talks about how the intellectuals got knocked out of power by the entrepreneurs, and how they are trying to push for regulations and controls to get back on top.
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Sorry, missed the point that part of figuring out who is elite is people who cannot be understood by the rabble. So, when people see cryptic tweets from Piper that sound wise, yet incomprehensible, they assume it’s because Piper is just that much wiser than they are.
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Mark – The way you describe how some people seem “wiser” reminds me of a series that a church we once attended did. It was a Dave Ramsey style of saving money, but from a different guy who wrote a different book (same concepts, though). He was bragging about how he saved money on the little things so he could use it on the big things. For example, he talked about how whenever he had an extra $5 he would go to his bank and have them apply it to his mortgage, thereby being able to pay off his house sooner. However, he was equally braggy about how he was able to go a full year on one tube of toothpaste (and not have one cavity!). It was this comment that made my husband and I look at each other and laugh. Really? You can go to the dollar store and get a tube of toothpaste if you don’t want to spend a lot of money.
Point being, we found out quickly how to sniff out when people are being blowhards and make it seem like they love to hear themselves talk and make people think that what they have to say is so important.
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Reminds me of this Flame warrior.
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“To live my days with Jacob’s Limp.
Nobody is commenting on this?!?!?!?!?
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